Dr. Tony Evans is the founder and senior pastor of Oak Cliff Bible Fellowship in Dallas, founder and president of The Urban Alternative and author of over 100 books, booklets and Bible studies. The first African American to earn a doctorate of theology from Dallas Theological Seminary, he has been named one of the 12 Most Effective Preachers in the English-Speaking World by Baylor University. Dr. Evans holds the honor of writing and publishing the first full-Bible commentary and study Bible by an African American. His radio broadcast, The Alternative with Dr. Tony Evans, can be heard on over 1,400 radio outlets daily and in more than 130 countries. Dr. Evans’ sermons are also streamed and downloaded over 20,000,000 times annually.
let’s go a little bit further in chapter
4
verse 30
do not grieve the holy spirit of god
by whom you were sealed for the day of
redemption
here’s our word sealed again
do not grieve the holy the holy spirit
of god
by whom you were sealed for the day of
redemption
he now brings up grieving the seal
okay the holy spirit is sealed
into the life of every believer he’s
god’s holy spirit
the third member of the trinity he says
do not grieve
him to grieve somebody is to make them
sad to grieve somebody is to make them
unhappy
to grieve somebody is to is to make them
cry
to grieve somebody is to bring bring
that mournful atmosphere into their
lives many a
parent has been grieved by their child
what their child did or been grieved by
their mate what their mate did
or what their mate said they’ve been
made
sad well the holy spirit is a person
let me tell you about the per the
emotional state
of the holy spirit one of our sermons on
the holy spirit
refers to him as a dove a dove the holy
spirit came down upon jesus
as a dove let’s review
doves are very sensitive birds
they’re extremely sensitive
just a look in their direction and
they’ll go
they’ll fly off quickly these pure
white beautiful doves
move quickly away when there is a threat
of any kind they don’t hang around and
see
they will to use human language cry
quickly when a man says about a woman
she’s so sensitive a woman says about a
man
he’s so sensitive in other words easily
offended easily grieved
easily made sad not not not
thick-skinned
he says do not grieve
the holy spirit the holy spirit
can be easily grieved
he is the sensitive member of the
trinity now why
is grieving him important
when you grieve a person using human
terms
what you have done is you have broken
off
the intimacy with that person if you
make a person sad they can’t
be close to you they can’t feel like
communicating with you
you’ve caused them hurt in pain they
want to shy back from you because you’ve
wounded them he says you have a seal
this seal is the holy spirit do not
make him unhappy
do not make him sad
so the question is what grieves the holy
spirit
how do you make him like a dove fly off
and fly away
well look at verse 29
let no unwholesome word proceed from
your mouth
but only such a word as is good for
edification
according to the need of the moment so
that it will give
grace to those who hear go to now verse
31
let all bitterness and wrath and anger
and clamor
and slander be put away from you along
with all malice
be kind to one another tenderhearted
forgiving each other just as god in
christ
also has forgiven
you so let me tell you
what makes the holy spirit cry
what makes the holy spirit mourn what
makes the holy spirit
sad in all of these verses and you can
read
verses 25 all the way through
to the final verse of this chapter verse
32. grieves the holy spirit
is when we use unkind words
have malicious thoughts or bitter
spirits
unkind words malicious thoughts
or bitter spirits when
those things are operating in the life
of the believer the holy spirit
has been made sad
he says let no unwholesome word come out
of your mouth
an unwholesome word is
a word that brings damage
to another person it’s
profanity cursing a person out
it is uh uh
offensive language ephesians chapter 5
verse 4 puts it this way
he says let there be no filthiness or
silly talk
or cois-jesting jokes designed to hurt
people
which are not fitting but rather giving
thanks
what he is saying is when you
use your mouth in cussing or cursing two
different words
cussing is profanity cursing
is where you wish ruin on somebody when
you say i wish you were dead
you have pronounced a ruinous curse on
them
when you use humor
to hurt so it really wasn’t a joke
you just made it sound like a joke
because the goal was wounding
things to make you laugh is not what
he’s talking about that’s sheer humor
he’s talking about course jesting
a joke with sandpaper on it in other
words you
you are seeking to wound with your words
you need to know
when you do that you have upset the holy
spirit
and where is the holy spirit he’s sealed
in you
he says in verse 30 whom you were sealed
until the day of redemption
many of us need to gargle daily with
spiritual mouthwash
because we have dirty mouths
and dirty speech and denigrating talk
and far too many of us that’s the way we
roll we say
we dare say well that’s just the way i
talk
no it’s like the lady said
to her pastor she said pastor i i got a
i got a
bad use to my tongue and i want to put
my tongue on the altar the pastor said
lady
lady we don’t have an altar that big
because she really had a bad mouth or
it’s like the uh
uh the daughter who her father was a
pastor and
the daughter said darn
she used the word don he said what what
oh no we don’t use that kind of word but
to
encourage you i’m gonna give you a
quarter
if you never use the word darn again
the daughter looked at her daddy who was
a pastor and said well shucks daddy i
know some words worth a dollar
because a lot of us feel that way a lot
of us feel like we can go deeper
deeper deeper we compete with the with
the worst sailors
in how we talk how we put down people
even if it’s not
profanity we seek to hurt
with our language and the holy spirit
is offended because he’s like a dove
psalm 109 verses 17 and 18
says when you curse not not cusp but
curse that is speak
to a person’s ruin when you do that
you have created a boomerang and he says
and it comes back on you so when you go
after somebody else
and which they’re ruined you’ve actually
invited that ruin
upon yourself ah that’ll make you think
twice about what you say right
that’s why we’ve got to make sure that
we watch our mouths that if we are
concerned
about our speech
when you go to the doctor one of the
first things he says is stick out
your tongue he’s not just looking for
things on your tongue
he knows that sticking out your tongue
will indicate whether there are deeper
things going on inside
and the way we speak to one another the
way husbands speak the wives wives speak
to husbands
parents the children saints the saints
races to races
even among christians
it is showing by our tongue something
much
deeper is going on and that is
the holy spirit is grieved
inside of us he is grieved by bitterness
he goes on to say where you
intentionally carry around
a bit of spirit wrath where you’re
seeking to hurt somebody
else due to your anger you slander
people you
you try to destroy them with your tongue
the absence of kindness to be
hard-hearted and cruel
mean-spirited and to hold grudges
now just forgiveness doesn’t mean you’ve
reconciled
reconciliation only comes when
repentance is there
but you must forgive so that you can go
on why
because you do not want to have a
grieved holy spirit locked up inside of
you
let me say that again you don’t want to
have
a grieved holy spirit sealed within you
because you can’t get rid of him so
every believer
has the holy spirit the holy spirit is
locked up inside of you
he is sealed so when you grieve him
where is he going to express his grief
inside of you because guess where he is
he’s inside of you how long is he inside
of you
tell the day of redemption so he’s
permanently inside of you which means
if you grieve the holy spirit on a
regular basis watch this now
you are going to be an unhappy christian
ah you know why a lot of christians are
miserable
because they got a mourning holy spirit
operating within them
the holy spirit’s crying every day have
you ever seen a wife
who cries every day or a child who cries
every day mourns every day
because of how their loved one speaks to
them
did you know that a lot of us are living
with a crying holy spirit
a grieving holy spirit well guess where
the holy spirit is
he’s combined with your human spirit so
if you have
a grieving holy spirit connected
with your human spirit how do you think
your
soul is going to function you’re going
to have a miserable soul
that’s why you can be sitting next to a
miserable saint
or married to a miserable christian
because they have a
grieving sad unhappy
holy spirit operating within them
because of how they are functioning as a
christian
they’re not being filled with the spirit
they’re not walking with the spirit
and they are perpetually living in a
spiritual
icu intensive care unit
because of their spiritual condition
people want to know how can you be saved
and be
this miserable this much for this long
because by your tongue or your attitude
or your actions you’ve got a holy ghost
crying all the time
and if he’s sad all the time and i’m
using human language of tears
to express the grief the sadness
so if he’s sad and he’s sealed in you
you’re going to be sad so you see
this holy spirit thing is not a not a a
small thing
just the opposite is true however if you
make him happy
you’re gonna be happy by your speech by
your attitude
by your kindness by your forgiveness
then he’s smiling your soul is smiling
so we can see a new grin on your faith
face
that’s really the joy of the lord it’s
when the holy spirit settles things down
in your soul because he’s comfortable
with you
you can be in a relationship with
somebody
you’re not comfortable with well a lot
of christians don’t make the holy spirit
feel good but
that can change simply by addressing
what he says beginning in verse 25 to
verse 32
of ephesians 4. so you need to read that
like read it again
and like re-read it again and then after
you read it that time
read it again so that you’re not making
the holy spirit
sad so that you can be glad and you can
free him up to do his work in your life