After 20 years of marriage in the spotlight, Kirk and Tammy have been through a lot. However, with Christ as their center, God has continued to use Kirk’s music and their ministry to change lives for His glory. Join us as we chat with Kirk and Tammy about life in the spotlight and what it means to have a marriage centered on Christ.

hey there so glad that you’re joining me

today I’m Priscilla and this is the chat

with Priscilla it’s where we sit down

and we chat about things that hopefully

will be a blessing to your life today

I’m excited because I get to introduce

you to a couple that I have known for

about two decades now they have made an

imprint not only on me personally and

the lives of the people who are around

them personally but they have made an

imprint on the entire world I’m talking

about Grammy award-winning gospel artist

Kirk Franklin and his wife Tammy we

don’t have a great conversation today so

stay tuned

[Applause]

[Music]

this is a good day it’s a good day to

have a good conversation with two of my

favorite people on the face of there

because they are just funny they are

delightful they enjoy each other and

they enjoy life in general they enjoy

their friendships they have a bountiful

beautiful life and the beauty of it sort

of rubs off on everybody who’s around

them it was just earlier this year that

I got to celebrate with them their 20th

anniversary 20 years of being married

that’s a big deal right that’s a big

deal and they’ve done it beautifully so

I thought it’d be a good time to just

sit on the couch with them my friends

and talk to them about the beauty of

their life the impact that they’ve made

on the people around them but most

importantly how special they are to each

other there are lessons we can learn

from Kirk and Tammy Franklin will you

please welcome them to the program today

[Applause]

[Laughter]

he’s a character doesn’t know what he

does y’all character right now right now

you’re gonna sit right over here can you

sit cut well we need booster seats okay

well it is what it is swing you’re not

gonna close you got to sit alone was

good season costume play I’m Erica

lightweight look at lightweight yeah I

forgot my pants they got a life well and

we wanted to make them high so we could

see you it so now yeah well I knew we

were going to have a good conversation

I’ve kind of been asking them to come

and fill in this couch for a very long

time and the coat is not comfortable

they are I would have come well it’s not

just that what you’re busy you guys have

a very very busy life and honestly

that’s why that’s model reasons I want

to talk to you because everybody’s lives

are busy y’all’s lives is kind of busy

on ten just because you have a very

public life and still somehow you’ve

made it to 20 years of marriage you

actually still like each other because

there’s some people who are still

married but they don’t really talk

they’re not really friends they don’t

really have a relationship with each

other

and you guys do so I want to talk to you

about why do you think

do you think that is that y’all still

are kind of feeling each other after all

these years you go for high it’s kind of

cute you know I think you know one of

the biggest things we’re good friends

and that was kind of the foundation of

our relationship from the very GetGo and

so you know just like when girlfriends

when you’re kind of on the outs with

your friend you can’t wait until you

know things get back together and so

that’s kind of how we’ve been is just

we’re really good friends we have I mean

we have so much fun together and I think

that when you say just print our friend

of hers

yes mommy yeah get in and I and I think

that sometimes women don’t realize how

important it is for a man to marry his

homey it’s very important to marry your

best friend or your Road dog the person

you can laugh and you know you can excel

within you know take the bed sheets and

pull up with your head and have a look

acid oh my gasps you know PMI is very

important 12 I think they’re important

to magic supplicate your wife with you

and you know this but you know it’s fun

and that’s a me I’m so far important for

men to be able to do that yeah we ate

when William is very it’s very important

to have fun and be right silly in there

because sometimes you know the whole

title of marriage can be so heavy and

waiting kind of take the fun out of just

hair and cool with each other like even

being safe that you know you were never

like I remember when I was trying to go

to seminary for a minute and there was a

big picture minute because I have ADHD

yeah you didn’t classroom I was like

yeah squirrel yeah but uh it was a big

picture that the head of Jesus sitting

with the disciples and he was leaned

over laughing like like somebody’s yeah

Oh Craig it up at is well within

sculpture I know what you’re talking

about sculpture that sits right in the

middle of the property I think so yeah I

think so I was 18 write this okay don’t

got it but but I’m at

asking one supporters like because you

never because it’s very important to

show the humanity of the say the

relation couldn’t always see him you

know stoic again and I think that when

you think about marriage and you know

funny is my wife was a lot like that

when we first got married

yeah like when we first cameras we were

already a ready-made family yeah had a

son when I was seventeen know what I’m

say to each other daughter she was night

issues fast I was not you were not a

good house of a Christian girl that’s

all I wasn’t perfect she was she was

perfect to me yeah you know and so um

what we got married it was very like she

she was Verbier like like every woman is

you’re so much more mature than the man

it was much more mature extended over so

I was running to try to get away your

injury and I read heard you got peppered

high and so okay when we got married she

was very serious about the schedules and

the planning and I was going along yeah

and I would have fun with him I want to

play and I don’t know no I remember your

being but you’ve loosened up a lot to

Kirk he has yeah I mean listen up you

just always a loose got then well I’m

not particular about your life and about

Tammy and about you know and you’ve kind

of you know up 20 years you kind of just

gotten a little bit more relaxed about

you think well because you try to learn

because again you know your your

examples are also kind of stoic – yeah

so you try to name as they’ve been

raised in the church especially the

african-american church at that time it

was very much about yeah acting older

yeah because you know definitely because

it rode every ball and appropriate in

love even when we look at all the

pictures of us said we look

oh yeah yell ago you know but you know

you know you know give you because we

were trying to be old yeah you know and

I wasn’t anybody ever went to that but

you know you try to fit in in that

church system well I look back at

pictures when I was 24 years old and I

thought because I was kind of kind of

being directed toward speaking and

teaching and so everybody I knew that

was up on a platform was 50 and they had

on these

John suits you know the Sims from Saint

John and they you know it’s like

buttoned up right up the center my hair

was in a French roll in the back man so

I look back at 24 years old and I’m like

I was like a news anchor alright what’s

happening

those Nancy Reagan suits that’s right

that’s exactly right yes okay so go

ahead and guess because I kind of know

y’all story but a lot of people don’t

you know and the reality is you have a

very public very public life Tammy is by

your side most of the time we see her

there comporting you lookin real cute

come on Tammy a few interview yeah this

can’t fit we don’t we don’t hate you we

don’t we’ve a few make you hate you but

you are cute and I just you know we see

you guys so people kind of get a good

picture of you but they don’t

necessarily know the picture of you

together how did you meet each other and

then how did you come to a place because

I know it’s kind of like you know been

out you know yeah how did you get to a

place where you know I’m going to be

married California to her because every

time I try you know like most manny tell

the story wrong you tell story well

alright yeah fantasy not wrong but you

know wrong brothel heaven in me let’s

just say it at all I don’t have any min

him there’s a couple of an audience yeah

I’m here and Jer my husband’s here too

so he got you okay gotcha good help me

but yeah me go ahead our story is really

long ago someone trying to release a

condensed version but we first met when

we were fresh out of high school and we

were at a water amusement park in

Arlington Texas and it was then called

wet and wild but it was a water music

park you have to clarify that because

wet and water what I have found low now

it’s called it’s called Hurricane Harbor

yeah okay yeah and so I was there with

my friends uh-huh and actually the guy I

was seeing at that time he was there

with his friends we got into a fight and

so I end up going outside of the

amusement park and it was getting ready

to close and so I had on you know this

cute little yellow bikini looking kind

of cute oh and I had a towel wrapped

around my waist

and so I’m just you know sitting there

waiting for my friends to come out and

these two guys come and

that’s the towel off of me and kind of

start you know how horse slang and so

you know I’m already not in a quite so

good mood yep and all of a sudden this

guy comes walking up wearing was it

crossed colors or Willie wear one of

these watch one of those boy dressed do

you move across cover yeah I remember

cross y’all remember that anybody know

Monica yeah new kids on the block you

new kids on the block yeah and so um you

know he’s fully clothed remember we’re

at a water music part and so I’m already

looking like okay who do this so he

starts chastising the guy didn’t have a

jheri curl he didn’t have a curl okay

half a curl it didn’t really ever do

well they did never curl all the way

over to curl all the way up so I

struggled with it oh so there was a

homemaker like a James Brown yeah

everybody need to go back and look at

the hole yeah what a jerk about James

Curle Branca boy battle-ax corny tell

anyway so he starts you know really test

typing the guys and so one of the guys

goes you’re the one that told us to take

the towel from her because you wanted us

to meet you wanted to meet her and I

hurt her friended and I named round now

meeting him today no one can you

wouldn’t be shocked by that story right

because I mean he’s used filially all

the time what I remember most is it made

me die laughing as in or glass I just

bust up laughing and so then I’m

thinking okay well the God that I was

seeing at the time was inside could get

ready to come out I can make him jealous

so I’m like you just stand right here to

use me I did for a second and

and we begin to know to kind of talk but

the thing that caught my attention I

said what are you doing here you know

fully clothed yeah he said well I’m a

minister music and I you know I’m just

leaving the church well I’m a I was a

church girl and that just spoke volumes

to me I mean I didn’t think I even

realized how much it did you know being

18 at the time

and he was being so honest about who he

was and he was unapologetic about it and

so you know then I wanted to like really

talk to him so I was like let’s go over

here what we you know couldn’t be seen

and when you still walking around in

your bikini with a minute I have my

Chalobah have my channel how much our

back story gotten my towel back okay

that’s good so we’re talking and he’s

telling me you know we’re talking about

our you know what I mean it was a really

deep conversation because he’s actually

very deep guy we’re gonna tell you that

effort and so he began to tell me you

know how he wants to do music and he

wants to do it at a whole other level

and how he loved all these different

genres he said you know I’m a hip hop I

love you know classical I love

old-school I want all of that and using

my music and I’m just listening to this

eighteen year old kid like me who has

this vision and I’m really in awe like

whoa wait you guys I’m not used to

meeting 18 year old boys yeah we’re

honest about coming from church have

some direction and I wasn’t you know so

I’m really intrigued yeah well we

exchanged numbers and I really ended up

realized thinking that he never called

me but he did and he got my sister she’s

mean and you know we all we all kind of

have that yeah very big family visiting

everyone right here I am the oldest of

seven yeah and he got who the leader

protective should not mean to go so it’s

called and got her on the phone or what

happened he’s a lot house she do all you

stop it was awesome yes thank you for

Phyllis awesomely off she’s a sister

that wool like yeah a real staff were

you like you know you’ll be Down Beat

yes and so literally you know she ant

she answered the phone and but she was

sweet she was she’s that system is like

she’s not here

yeah and so he thought and I was so

timid aided by that folks her I was so

timid a I’m so timid a divided it I’d

never called back so I thought he never

calls me how do you never call so fast

forward I told y’all this was long I’m

trying to speed it up fast for three

yeah like years go by 4 3 4 C this is

Lemmy 1980 our 3 who we don’t agree that

was 19 oh my gosh my nose because it’s

not recording century cursed

thank you for my interview and that’s

right right right I’m trained I did this

I’m trained when he wants to be he’s

right okay anywho so it’s about three

and a half I’ll meet you in the middle

about three and a half years later and a

girlfriend my dad my mom yeah and a

girlfriend of mine was dating a guy that

was working on this guy’s demo and she’s

like oh my gosh you have to meet him

he’s doing music and his mic infused

with everything and I did not register

with me I’m like okay that’s cool and so

she’s like you should come to the to the

recording you know he’s gonna record the

demo at this church and I just said you

know I still think I’m interested I’m

not interested in meeting anyone my

daughter’s biological father and I were

no longer together and it just kind of

wasn’t interested and so she’s like she

finally convinced me to come Teesha yes

and we have a good friend tisha in

common and I’ll go to the recording and

he jumps out onstage I’m sure they

announcer with names jumped out on he

jumps out all day and he had this best

on his part that was like engraved you

know in his head was in the James Curle

was it there’s no more sophisticated a

more sophisticated feel curls working a

little better it’s a little better and

if you know it’s a little tapered in the

back and have any way have you seen Kirk

Franklin in concert because it is if

there is nothing kind of poised and put

together in terms of his presentation

you’re not you know when you think kind

of Christian worship artists been angry

aerobics I said it is it is the most

energetic amazing thing you’ve ever seen

because he literally is jumping around

for two hours and given the gospel like

he’s a preacher of the gospel of Jesus

Christ and that is clear through every

single stanza of every word that you

think and we’re grateful for because our

lives have been changed by your ministry

a lot

trying to get forces so he’ll jump out

on stage he does and I’m like did you

recognize I did immediately I said to my

girlfriend I said is his name Kirk and

she said yes and so I’ve been trying to

tell you about I’m like oh my gosh and I

wasn’t upset at that moment I hadn’t

thought about the fact wait a minute he

didn’t call me yes wasn’t bad it was

he’s doing it he’s doing it he’s doing

exactly what he said he was going to do

and so I’m literally sitting there and

complete awe like oh my gosh and so you

know the concert is amazing and it

eventually ends up being the why we sing

album I was about to ask him that the

lot we might be say yeah why we can help

y’all remember that song the reason why

I sing yeah so she can sing yes you can

not really

yes you can so here so after the concert

my girlfriend’s like why don’t you come

back and say hello

well you know the you know good little

girl and I’m like no that’s okay so

anyway I didn’t I told my girlfriend

that she can give me give him my number

and he calls me and when he was on stage

he was kind of checking me out and but

he did call him from the stage checking

you out yes I mean you know doing his

little moves any bad part is that what

he was I was a little artist checking

out a woman on the always America you

know he’s 20 year old 22 yeah are you 22

she was fine yeah beautiful and you know

and I mean she was my wife she was your

wife yeah that’s what I’m gonna yeah

yeah zero in on her yeah you clean that

up real good good now let’s go yeah you

clean kind of a lot of sanctified

answers yeah what’s good so so he calls

me and you know he obviously you know

was trying to check me out but he didn’t

remember me initially like that you know

as the girl that he met at the water MS

she didn’t have a bikini on and then I

was Oliver

yes yeah and so Gary would you come with

me brother

you know I said to him do you remember

me and so you know he’s fine you know

and I Reno refresh his memory he goes oh

my gosh I said you never called me yes I

did so we get into the back of

about it long story short we end up

seeing each other next day we got

married

shall we do not long till on number 21

years 21 years we have four children

still together homie I love her next

question yes I mean there’s only there’s

a whole lot more but anyway that’s

that’s how we met that was your question

how did you meet sounds at how were you

in there I mean that’s a good answer

actually we liked all those details

anyway yeah that’s good stuff right

there and for the people that are on the

verge of maybe blended families that are

in it right now and they’re trying to

figure out some help to really blend

well what are some of the hiccups that

y’all ran across grants some of the

lessons that you learned about how to

blend well well you know chemi comes

from such good stock her mom and dad the

end of the seven siblings that she has

is the blender stand as well right it’s

like the Brady Bunch that’s what we’re

all y’all yeah Cosby

yeah well I don’t know that’s good

anymore so Cosby Stowe is amazing yes it

is how the show’s good on they’ve

invited act up so she came from this

good place of having such a good teacher

cuz ya help healthy Emma’s dead as a

major mr. Collins yeah I’ll have his mom

it’s a beast

– yeah so beasts is good yeah oh yeah

like like like like for example it’s so

incredible Tami’s first cabinet first

year marriage

we’re married like 10 months but yeah

but tell Emma she was pregnant with our

first child and and we had home it was

house that I purchased before we got

engaged so we got married we were living

in this house

her parents were living out of town with

siblings they all came in town for the

holidays Christmas so the house is

packed full of a siblings and mom and

dad upstairs and tamid I get it to this

horrible fight I’m a horrible thought of

corn

horrible fight right and so so as with I

she yells our dad she said daddy and how

did she say it daddy

and no money I was acting a fool I don’t

say how the truth tell about this how

exactly the 26 year old fool yeah right

I let me tell me okay and so that’s the

fool and so she’s like Daddy and you’re

like it’s been a what you said yeah

thanks a ton of my dad say in front of

my dad I did I went total Supergirl I’m

like there’s I like better part of my

dad I started one of my daddy to pen

nerdy kid it’s like three o’clock in the

morning Oh our mom and dad come out of

the room that money and mind you I’m

adopted I have no mother no father no

siblings it saw me by myself what the

house full of my family yeah if I’m

trying to goodbye to my side well by

myself so I’m in house by myself no

family everybody houses our family and

I’m still nine ten months in the

marriage so when she yelled for him I

was upset and angry because again this

is the house that I bought before we got

married yes so I’m like you know I’m by

myself

yeah Tammy’s mom and dad came out of the

room at 3 o’clock in the morning grab my

hand grab Tammy’s Hanan in the middle of

that floor they both fell on their knees

I started praying for us yeah man I’ve

never had a day and I was about to say

you’ve never seen anything like that in

your life I don’t think anybody’s ever

see me do like that because when my

daughter would have been calling for me

if I wanted daddy how would a karate

chop that boy so bad

[Music]

but her mom and dad just mirror just a

horrible because for them your he was

their son I was behind and so they were

pulling the son and daughter together

and rebuking any spirit against this

Union man that broke me and I hardly

keep fighting in the midst of that oh it

was always on my side yeah yeah and you

know what you know this is what I want

to ask you I can’t believe how quickly

the time goes into the end of our oh

this just part

one just part one up but I want to end

asking you this question Kurt because

you brought up the fact that you’re sort

of from this for lack of a better word

dysfunctional family moment in terms of

your upbringing so this is the first

time as you’re coming into the Collins

sort of camp

I know it’s Franklin she’s married into

your camp but you’re seeing mr. mrs.

Collins you’re seeing a healthy marriage

where a husband is leading and praying

and people that are coming together I

want to ask you how did what you came

out of how did it sort of shape mistakes

that you were making or bents that you

had in what you tended toward in your

marriage and how did you find the

healthy marriage that you saw in your

in-laws sort of begin to reshape and

reformulate the way you wanted to

establish her own family great question

I was adopted when UPS 4 by 64 your

widow she was a widow and she raised me

on Social Security food stamps and

government funding my my biological

grandfather was at prison for murder and

a step-sister ad half sister with the

same mother to pretend I saw her father

being her he was in pray was a prison my

sister at the age of 17 went to prison

for 10 years at 13 I heard my biological

mother tell my adoptive mother I wanted

an abortion I didn’t even want him I was

raised in that dysfunction of being

rejected so I was born being a fighter

and I was always short I’ve been this

high since I was seven yeah you know

Jerry told me because he Jerry my

husband and Kurt were in church together

growing up go to the same church man I

told you how Tom’s Jerry Jerry six three

yeah so Jerry sakera me on my on his hip

just kidding you put me on Origin hi

Luke

perfect so I was raised being a fighter

she was raised being very solution

driven you know you know hey we could

work this out and I would fight and try

to push you away and be very quick to go

because I was it’s almost like I was so

used to being at you want abandon that I

would want to do it first because I felt

like someday you were going to do it

anyway yeah and so that type of

dysfunction of thinking I love me

everyone win and then I met somebody who

was healthy you know Tammy meant you

know and I don’t want to make me she

wasn’t perfect but brush she was so very

close hahaha we like Tammy don’t realize

Eric she saved my life

she saved my life she saved my life

because I was a really really broken kid

and and that drug was music and not

being erased at a very healthy Church

environment you know westport religion

because you know when you when you have

a gift

sometimes in the urban church your gift

can sneak you through yep yeah and no

one ever questions your character and

your integrity and so you can slide

through and you can date all the girls

in the church and do all of that because

but then that spotlight starts to burn

you alive because you have no strength

of character to carry you because if the

light shining on you it’s brighter than

the light shining in you and so what a

light shining on you will destroy you

destroy you yeah and and you were doing

destroyed I was getting destroyed

selling billions of albums yeah while

being destroyed yeah and then I ran into

a guy by the name of Tony Evans Thank

You Torian and another hero yeah you

know and I talked about that too much

I can do that too much I talked about

Tammy and Tony can’t do it too long yeah

Kirk Franklin will be at my father’s

house my dad is Tony Evans he’s my

pastor – he’s their pastor how long

y’all been at the church 18 yeah 18

years so

Kirk will be at my father’s house I call

your daddy’s but his best friend no no

my play for it then go play with your

play by the other night well he said

Kirk’s kind of like our fifth sibling

there four of us but then there’s Kirk

Kirk is our fifth sibling and he will

very consistently not only with your

father but with my father very

consistently pressed into that

relationship he’ll be over there late at

night he’ll be on the phone calling on

chasing wisdom chasing health chasing a

shaped mentality from the men who have

gone before you you’ve made that not

mansion which is not my natural nature

I’m naturally the one that’s afraid to

get on peoples nerves because I know

that he has kids and so I’m always

afraid of getting on your nerves but he

has so much of what I need and I’m

willing to run the risk of looking like

a fool hmm you know just I’d always tell

Purcell all the times thank you for

letting me get the crumbs thank you for

letting me get the crumbs because I take

the crumbs and I make a meal I make a

meal that it makes me a better man for

her for my kids and it should not repeat

the same cycle that my father and his

father the father made because that

whole history expanded but you know and

your dad’s willingness to you know

disciple him if you know he really

didn’t have that we first got married I

mean a lot of it went great I mean he

you know good pastors in his life but

you know I think that yeah but I had

pastors they wanted me to announce my

tithe yeah yeah because they wanted to

motivate the church deacon had a parade

per tablet area and a theology and as

hardwood theology yeah they were more

intrigued with celebrity Kirk Franklin

and but your dad gave him more this is

bad

in the hope that a pastor was you to

announce your ties yeah what is it

so you know I don’t cliff if you get

there late you got to sit there balcony

yeah you know your dad willingness to

give him what he really needed and look

past you know who he to ask him what

questions

and the heart targeted in business so

they gave me a new husband what is yeah

when it was time to join the church and

we were going through the new membership

program and it came up about baptism

well I had been baptized as I was for

cuz in the you know the black Baptist

Church you had to be baptized for you

could say in the choir I replayed house

four years old I didn’t know what to do

I know what I was doing I chose not

those kids no pool

yes go swimming in pools you know but

all of the kids were swimming in clothes

and so you have a but did you have a

shower cap on to protect your jheri curl

yes sir because David thought it was a

natural everything that axel yeah yeah I

want to keep that big you know I’d uh I

started going to the church they

misquoted the new membership program and

found that had to be baptized I went to

your dad head up sir I know that to be a

member you have to be bad pass through

the you know through the nutria program

and you know listen I set up I was 29

and I said I said I uh you know know

that probably other people have to have

my albums and you know and a little bear

saying the fact that they may not know

and I’m not anti so I was kind of you

know I was in stuttering I was kind he

stopped me said are you asking me to

give you a private baptismal and I said

well you know he said you must be out of

your mind

he said you have lustre if you think the

whole point of it is I like raisin you

want to get you say you won’t get your

behind up there like everybody else

I remember that down remember that fun

desu and the Sunday that I did it you

don’t remember what happened to you

Sunday that I did it because you know

when you get baptized family members in

the audience got thinkin you’re about to

say yeah when it was not having a better

has the whole music Ministry of the

church stood up there was a neat family

yes family family yeah you know so you

know it is it is incredible yeah I mean

part of that legacy legacy thank you and

well and now you guys are creating your

own legacy you have a beautiful

beautiful family of your own we’re going

to talk about that even more when we

come back for part two of this

conversation because we’ve got lots of

good stuff that we need to cover getting

to know this couple and the life lessons

that they have that are really helping

us to live our lives the best way we

possibly can so will you guys please

help go to say I agree great look at

they go clap it’s not a break that’s the

end of part one they go clap cause over

at home now

no you know hold on we still have to

take part – okay you just sit this is my

show gotcha better sorry I don’t I don’t

care how many Grammys you got all the

other Wars you know Madeline told some

of that stone will sell the W ideas for

people to the mass through much of their

granted to programs

Oh

[Applause]

[Music]

you