When Denise’s ex-husband broke into her home with a gun, her newly-wed husband lured him outside to protect his new wife, his two children and her three children. Corey Mattison was already his family’s hero, but that day he saved their lives by laying down his own, the ultimate illustration of the Gospel of Jesus Christ. Join us as we hear from Denise about her heroic husband Corey and how Christ has comforted her these past few months.When Denise’s ex-husband broke into her home with a gun, her newly-wed husband lured him outside to protect his new wife, his two children and her three children. Corey Mattison was already his family’s hero, but that day he saved their lives by laying down his own, the ultimate illustration of the Gospel of Jesus Christ. Join us as we hear from Denise about her heroic husband Corey and how Christ has comforted her these past few months.
hey there I am so glad that you’re here
I’m Priscilla welcome to the chat this
is the place where we just kind of you
know chat about things in our lives
things that matter today is an important
conversation because we’re going to be
talking about something that a lot of
people just kind of hold inside hold in
their hearts and in their own minds and
they don’t really talk about it they’re
not really open and honest about the way
they’re feeling we’re gonna talk about
Greece what do you do when you really
have experienced a traumatic loss one
that has left a hole in your heart and
you’re trying to figure out how you’re
going to recover from that
and move forward in health and wholeness
we’re going to talk to a couple people
today whose stories really will touch
your heart and I have a feeling they’re
going to be so many of you that are able
to relate specifically to what they say
so you’re going to want to stay tuned
grab a fresh cup of coffee or whatever
your favorite drink is pull up a chair
and let’s check
so glad you’re here this is really going
to be a great conversation I want you to
know that I’m just sort of tinkering
around on Facebook right now I want you
to see this incredible image of a young
lady named Denise Denise and her husband
on their wedding day a gorgeous picture
and they are in love they are happy and
looking forward to a lifetime together
and I’m reading a little bit of a post
that she put up January of this year she
said that we all have those moments when
we lose hope the moment when it feels as
though surely there could be no God or
at least none that we would call good
whether that moment is captured within
minutes or a lifetime the despair flows
from deep within our hearts leaving us
Hollow where is God the Bible says the
Lord is near to the brokenhearted
what nearness will tend to this wound
what could possibly cover this kind of
agony Denise has a story to tell one
that I think is going to touch your
heart one that I think is maybe going to
stir up something in so many of you and
and me that we just kind of have to deal
with she’s got a story of hope and
healing that is going to encourage us
all would you guys please help me to
welcome Denise Madison to our program
today agony
oh I’m so glad that you’re here so glad
that you’re joining us you got a little
baby bug there Denise um this that’s
true I do yeah it’s kind of hard to hide
now yeah I know and you look lovely
you look lovely um you know I as I’m
looking at you know this on Facebook
it’s there’s such a disparity between
the picture we just showed you just you
look happy content peace filled and then
to read the text that you posted along
with it there’s obviously a story behind
that picture and behind those words and
so I know that you married this guy his
name is Corey you were married for about
six months that’s correct right tell us
how you met well so we actually we both
think it’s quite funny because we met
online yeah and so so it works you know
what it does as a matter of fact it was
the last place either one of us expected
to be but both of us had family members
that kind of encouraged that very very
early on we began writing love letters
to one another essentially and he would
tell me that he fell in love with me
before we ever even met face-to-face and
so it was absolutely you know it was it
was kind of courting he won me over with
the way that he would would just kind of
write and he convinced me somehow to
meet up with him and and then from there
yeah it was not very long at all before
we both were madly in love with one
another and kind of weren’t really sure
what anyone else would think but we were
ready to get married yeah how come how
long was this from the time you met or
started courting and dating to when you
got married so from the time that we met
until we actually got married gosh I’ve
not actually done the months but about
eight months okay 8-ounce alright and so
then you walk down the aisle you said I
do to Corey and you were and you were
married for six months but things didn’t
quite end up how I’m sure you envisioned
it when you said I do that day now can
you tell us a little bit about what
happened
absolutely so on the night that the
night that Corey died
I was coming home from taking my
daughter to basketball practice and my
ex-husband had come to the door and as I
walked in there had already been a lot
of shooting that had taken place and so
my husband and lured him out of the
house away from us away all the danger
away from the kids and I and he lost his
life that night saving mine so and so he
was shot he was he was shot and he was
literally trying to protect you and the
kids he was literally trying to protect
us yes without question how long ago was
this
this happened on January 15th so we’re
talking five months four months um it’s
not quite four months not yet four
months yeah
so this is a real fresh fresh wound in
your life and in your heart and yet for
some reason you’re choosing to talk
about it today yeah why oh gosh that’s
actually pretty easy so um you know
there’s so much suffering in this world
you know the Madison family I’d say that
one of the things that this has has has
helped us to see is that 90% of the
world nine differant of the population
they understand difficult they
understand hard and we’re sheltered a
bit in Western culture and you know we
don’t oh we don’t really when something
hard happens we kind of want to say God
why did you let this happen the rest of
the world hard happens all the time but
what I will tell you is that we have
found the hope and we know that um you
know when the Bible says these all died
not having received the promises but
having seen it afar off we know that the
hope is what is to come the hope is only
found in Jesus Christ we’re going to
suffer either with him or without him
and if there’s one thing that I can
share with people is I want them to know
they don’t have to suffer without him
that’s awesome that’s so great I want to
know what it feels like to lose someone
like that so suddenly um if you can
somehow describe
what that feels like and put that into
words how would you die well I’ll tell
you that it feels differently on
different days um I would say that
initially it’s just it’s it’s this giant
void and and it’s something that you
know will never be filled
it is devastating it’s like your heart
he’s been ripped out and it’s the kind
of thing that could completely um if
anything could kind of take you out so
to speak it’s that sort of you
absolutely lie absolutely yes did you
feel any Fault in it in the sense that
this guy was trying to protect you and
lost his life doing it did you struggle
at all even though it would have been
really irrational to struggle in that
way sometimes situations like this cause
us to go into irrational places and I’m
wondering if you thought if he wouldn’t
have been working so hard to be my
Savior he might still be alive did you
blame yourself at all for any of this oh
absolutely
I did well uh what were your what was
your rationale like what would have been
your the blame you would have placed on
yourself for what if he hadn’t if he
hadn’t loved me
if he hadn’t met me if he hadn’t wanted
to be what he was to our children if he
hadn’t wanted to be my hero if he hadn’t
wanted to protect me there was no
question in his mind there was no
question that God brought him to be our
protector you can read his journal
entries you can read what he wrote in
his Bible it is so clear that he knew it
um oh god I read on on Facebook you took
a picture of just a quote that he wrote
in his Bible and he was saying Lord make
me courageous make me a courageous
protector for my wife
and for my kiddos and in the most
visible obvious way he demonstrated the
love that he had for you and it cost him
his life but what a beautiful
demonstration really and picture of
Christ’s love for us that really the
Lord put himself in harm’s way for
Ashley is that did you in any way feel
the Lord speaking to you about that sort
of a correlation between what Cory was
willing to do sure so it’s so
interesting because I would have told
you that Cory’s my hero way before that
night as a matter of fact every single
I’ve gone back and looked at cards that
I wrote to him and I called him a hero
and every one of them and he laid his
life down for me every day of our
marriage he truly loved me the way that
a husband is to love his wife if I can
I’ll just share something then that kind
of it correlates and he would always
tell me my sweet D I love you for
everything that you are and I don’t
spend a second thinking about anything
that you’re not and that’s how he loved
me every single day and so absolutely he
already laid his life down for me and
then for there to be the ultimate laying
of his life down that night I’ve thought
a lot about it and honestly it’s it’s
given a deeper meaning to what Christ
was willing to do on my behalf I mean I
don’t there’s not a lot of people in the
world who can say not only did Jesus die
for me but I had a person who willingly
laid their life down so that I could
live how are your kids doing and tell us
your children you have three children
that you had from your previous
relationship is that right that’s great
and then two children that were his
children um but now you’ve got sort of
this brood of five we do absolutely it’s
glorious chaos how are your kids
handling all of this and it’s still so
fresh for them too it is so it’s it’s
different obviously because of the ages
we’ve got 14 to 4 so it’s it’s varies
from child to child I would say that
they are struggling and
and we rarely go through a week when
they all make it to school for you know
for a full week without having to come
home for something and as much as you
know the nightmares are terrible and and
they wouldn’t did they see him actually
they died they didn’t witness that okay
at all of the After Effects and
unfortunately they had to hear me give
the account of what happened to the 911
operator so so they know enough and the
older children are old enough they heard
everything that happened and so you know
they have their own they have their own
guilt they have their own all the things
at York that you are explaining those
are things that they’ve had to go
through as well but I can tell you that
one of the things that our family loves
to do is we talk about the hope we talk
about that every day we get to get up we
choose we either choose to allow this to
render us useless for the kingdom or we
choose to shine the light of Jesus
Christ and I can tell you that there are
days when the kids will just say mom I
just need to stay home and that’s okay
and there are days that they’ll say I am
sad but I’m going to go to school I’m
going to shine the light of Jesus Christ
our eleven-year-old witnesses to his
Muslim friends on a regular basis and he
doesn’t he didn’t care what it is that
they say back to him because he says mom
they need Jesus too I have a feeling I
know where they get that from
and then two weeks after Corey’s funeral
yes what did you find out so two weeks
after the funeral I found out but I was
pregnant and we were not trying to have
a baby so I mean five is one thing and
we you know we talked about it from time
to time and it would it would always go
something like really 13-year old and a
newborn you know because she had just
turned 14 so we always convinced
ourselves that it was not not wise but
God had other plans obviously yeah well
and I know that children are a gift they
are gift but in this situation was it
hard for you to come to grips with the
fact that you were going to be
introducing a child into the sit
scenario and learning that so quickly
and freshly after burying your husband
and was it good news you know it’s
that’s a really great question because
the day that I that I took the test it
kind of went something like this no
matter which outcome the sadness was
going to be there one way or the other
mmm however if I was pregnant there
would also be some joy it doesn’t they
don’t cover one another god no so the
baby doesn’t make any of the sadness go
away but it’s brought us some joy and
it’s done something especially for the
kids there is a delight and the five of
them together I really wish that you
could see it is just the sweetest thing
and it it kind of helps me to understand
how is that God brings our families
together and he grabs us he grabs us in
that way
but this is on something just incredible
for them and they have such joy and they
crowd around my belly and I talked to
the baby and they all want to sleep with
me yeah not really me it’s the baby they
want to sleep with um and it’s it’s a
bit of Cory there it’s a bit of Cory it
is that is you know it kind of still in
your lives you know and that probably
brings them and you a lot of solace as
well we’re going to talk to you more I
want to talk to you about this hero of
yours and what made him such a hero to
you and we just want to hear more about
this woman and how she found such
stability I mean the fact that you can
sit on this sofa and talk to us so
articulately about what happened and
also the transformation and changing
your life that right there to me is a
testament of how the Grace and the
goodness of God has already been
demonstrated in your circumstances so
we’re going to talk to you more you guys
stay tuned and we’ll be right back
hi I’m Priscilla and I wanted to take an
opportunity to invite you personally to
join me for a seventh session Bible
study on the armor of God will dive
deeply into what it means to be equipped
to stand firm against the schemes of the
enemy he is very real and he has been so
strategic and targeted in his attacks
against us why shouldn’t we be equally
strategic than targeted in standing firm
against him and you and I have an
opportunity to suit up to put on some
armor that works and to go to battle and
to see victory declared in our lives and
the lives of those people that we learn
this Bible study will be one that will
change our lives forever and will help
us to walk in victory so plan to join me
won’t you the armor of God
well there’s just a lot you know a lot
of your life that you have decided to
share with people you know on your
Facebook page and otherwise and you know
it really is a testament to to really
just how you have seen the grace of God
through all of this and in spite of all
of this and even not only with you we
were talking about your kids before the
break and her 11 year old tell me his
name again
Marshall Marshall so her 11 year old
wrote this he said when Pastor Mike said
that said the words I pronounce you
husband and wife to Corey and to his mom
he says I was the happiest man or
eleven-year-old let’s just go with
person that’s how you said I was the
happiest person on earth that day things
couldn’t get any better but I did lose
my ipod but anyway I’m getting off topic
he said you know what today’s been
another day full of emotion I’m so
thankful to everybody for the outpouring
of love because today we’re celebrating
the life of my hero Corey Madison he
sacrificed himself to save me well not
just me obviously he also saved my
amazing sisters and Madison and my
beautiful which he spelled be-you-ti-ful
my beautiful mom I’ve heard that word
hero a lot not only from your 11 year
old son but I’ve heard it so much from
you
why was Corey your hero what was what
was happening in your life up until the
time you met him whatever you can share
there’s so much that Denise is not able
to share just because of the logistics
legally with everything that is going on
but of what you can share what made
Corey such a hero in your life and to
your kids well for one I would say that
not a lot of men would walk in to a
situation and just openly accept and
love a woman and her children and what
he was willing to do what he was willing
to
of step into and there were very you
know difficult circumstances there was
there was an entire other side that he
had to deal with that was was not easy
well I would assume that ultimately what
happened didn’t just come out of nowhere
I would assume there would have been a
progression of things that would have
sort of led up to that that moment that
might want to happen absolutely and I
can tell you that you know for Marshall
one of the things that was so amazing is
that Corey continually demonstrated
self-control and patience in the midst
of you know circumstances where he very
likely should have just kind of law you
know lost his temper said something or
fought back he refused to defend himself
he refused he would he would always say
these children need to see someone who’s
willing to exercise self-control on
their behalf because unfortunately they
haven’t they haven’t had that experience
and they need someone who’s willing to
stand up and do that for them and that’s
exactly why I mean he was their hero for
that reason he was their hero for you
know I can’t tell you how many things
they will now say well you know it’s
pizza and wing Thursday because that was
Cory’s tradition it’s you know they’re
just so many have low it heats and wing
well I know it’s supposed to be every
fourth Thursday but Marshall would never
know that um but you know honestly he
from the moment that that he was
committed to me he wasn’t just committed
to me he was committed to those children
and and the same was true for for me
with Tenley and Asher his children yes
yeah for a family we really I mean we
both felt like those were the five that
God gave us and and we both prayed prior
to getting married that God would do
something in our hearts that he would
allow us to have the same love for all
of the children and and it was not I’ll
never forget the time that he said it
was like God gave me these three
children and when they were born they
just happened to be you know at that
time they were 12 and 10 and five just
happened to be those ages but it
have been any different they just were
bored to me at those ages yeah and the
same same for me
and he he loved them he poured into them
and did all of the things that a father
was supposed to do and those kids they
needed it desperately and he was he was
daddy to all five of them so here’s what
I want to know I want to know how you go
from the kind of posts that I read at
the top of this show where you are in
the depths of despair you have questions
you’re trying to figure out what kind of
God can be good to allow this to happen
to me how do you get from there to
sitting on this sofa willing to share
hope with people with others how do you
get out of bed the next day and the day
after that how do you continue to serve
your family and you know it’s hard to
figure out a new way to cook chicken for
dinner on a good day so I’m trying to
figure out how do you go from man I
don’t want to get out of bed to being
able to pull yourself together and move
forward what does that process look like
for you right so I will say that there
were plenty of times that I didn’t want
to get out of bed and plenty of times I
just wanted to lay and cry it is when
your faith is challenged when you’re
kind of brought to the place where you
have to say what do I really believe
that’s kind of when you decide you know
I feel like we all have these I call
them are you in moments where the Lord
is saying okay now here’s your
circumstance are you in here’s the
circumstance are you in you know and
honestly I think it was when God helped
me to see how inverted we’ve we’ve kind
of caused the relationship to be and we
look and say God how could you allow
this to happen to me how could you do
this to me when we’ve kind of we’ve kind
of gotten it the wrong way the truth is
that it is us who Oh God everything he
doesn’t owe us anything you know and
when you truly come to the understanding
of what he has done for you
it is nothing more than outpouring of
your 11and and desire for him now I’ll
say that’s part that’s that’s part 1
part 2 is truly believing what Jesus
said what Paul told us about that the
hope is to come yeah right you know this
morning one of the verses that I read is
a 2nd Corinthians 4:17 and it’s for this
for the light and momentary affliction
is preparing for us an eternal weight of
glory beyond comparison yeah right so if
we believe that and we believe that what
is to come is as far is going to far
exceed any light and momentary
affliction no matter what it is
then then can’t we kind of endure
anything what about the person that
feels like they can’t though I mean in a
real no and not to minimize anything
you’ve just said because I believe all
that right but in a real practical how
do I get out of bed someone is in bed
right now they’re trying to figure out
how to move on with their life in a very
practical sense whether it is counseling
or accountability or you know
proactively writing verses on a 3 by 5
card so that you can see them all the
time what did you literally practically
have to do to walk in the direction of
healing and I know you’re still walking
that course goodness gracious it’s only
been a few months Thanks and you still
have a journey ahead of you right but
what have you had to practically do as a
woman who wants to be whole and healthy
does that journey looked like um so I
mean I’ll just say and it’s different
for everyone I’m not I would never want
to say that there’s a formula right
because there just isn’t what has worked
so I’ll tell you what’s worked for me
number one is you have to have your eyes
on Jesus and for me personally eyes on
Jesus looks like playing worship music
at all times you know I do believe in
all and all things we can always you
know praise His name there are moments
when I can do nothing more than just lay
prostrate on the floor and just cry but
as I cry I’ll say
nevertheless you are my god nevertheless
you are my god and I think we have to
remind ourselves of that you know we
have to remind ourselves of who he is
and I believe strongly in in kind of
taking and meditating on his word and
allowing it to minister to you and even
the moments when somebody gives you a
verse and it means absolutely nothing to
you in the moment because you’re
thinking you don’t get it you don’t get
it it’s saying nevertheless I’m not
gonna I’m not gonna base things off of
how I feel or my emotions I’m gonna base
things off of what I know to be true
which is God’s character and so that’s
that has been what has has gotten me
through does that mean that I have that
I don’t have days where I’m done and I
just have to say to my boss I’m sorry
I’m not coming in today and I have to
kind of like check out that happens but
that’s okay too because God’s working in
those moments as well God’s working a
lot in those moments to be honest with
you you know really what I’m hearing you
say that I think a lot of us sort of
miss the the power of and the importance
of is I’m hearing you say that basically
gratitude matters that saying okay here
are the tears I have a lot of why
questions this is a bad day but I’m
still going to say thank you Lord for
and and list what it is of who he is and
what he is still accomplishing in our
life on a regular basis and would you
say that praising him recognizing who he
is and what he has done that that has
been sort of part of the healing process
is just making yourself remember all of
the benefits of your God despite what
has happened absolutely I think I think
for sure it’s reminding myself who he is
and yes it is it’s having a grateful
heart and in addition to having a
grateful heart I really do think that
it’s also believing that what is to come
is going to exceed any amount of pain
that we have here did you have to have
any people in your life to sort of shake
you and say come on we’re getting out of
the dumps we’re going to move forward
let me help you have you had any friends
sort of do any sort of tough love we got
it we got to come on
we got kids to feed we got a life to
live I’m not going to let you kind of
get lost in this moment in your life
I’ve had a lot of friends around and
I’ve had a lot of people that have been
there perhaps if you asked them the
question they might answer it a little
bit differently I would say that that in
the dumps really hasn’t been me or you
know that has amazing that you can say
that that you have not been in a kind of
a pit you haven’t found yourself in this
pit you can’t get out of after this sort
of a traumatic event there would be you
know there might be a few hours in a day
but we’re talking in the very very
beginning when there were you know 20
people in the house at any given time
and and and and they truly were allowing
me to kind of have my moments and there
are plenty of people I knew tending to
the children making sure that everyone
was fed and everyone was happy and so I
don’t I don’t really think that they’re
necessarily been anyone that’s had to
say come on get with it you know you
need to you know you need to you just be
strong but do I have people that are
saying that to me every single day
saying you know you can do this
absolutely absolutely
what is still hard for you okay because
the reality is and I mean on a daily
practical sense in other words the
reality is it was a scary situation that
night okay
scary no who wants to have any sort of
intruder in your house you’ve got an
armed weapon or he’s armed you have a
weapon involved
it’s just all-around scary do you have
trouble sleeping at night do you have
trouble living alone with your children
what is just hard for you right now um
so I don’t have fear in the sense that
that you might think and I do believe
that that’s that that’s just kind of a
god thing yeah it doesn’t seem like I
should absolutely I don’t I don’t sleep
very well but that has a lot more to do
with the loss you know a lot we all had
nightmares in the beginning for me those
of kind of subsided the everyday hard it
is hard
waking up every single morning I sleep
with his shirt and
waking up another morning knowing that
he’s not there is hard and we’ve
celebrated four birthdays now and next
week is going to be Mother’s Day and his
mom is gonna have to go through the same
thing that we’ve you know kind of all
gone through those are those are hard
yeah you you can’t imagine what it’s
like to want more than anything to to
share you know joy with your children
but to know that there’s someone there’s
someone that’s missing and we all know
it yeah so every day is hard you know it
could be a moment that somebody at work
who you know doesn’t know the whole
story just kind of happens to say no now
what happened exactly and and then
that’s it I’m done it’s hard when my
kids are having a hard day your mother
so you understand that there is nothing
that is harder than watching your child
suffer yeah and yet you have happened
you have been able to find hope in this
you’ve been able to it’s very clear to
all of us that God has been guiding you
through this that he’s been helping you
through this that again the very fact
that you’re able to articulate your
feelings and do it in a way that you you
so clearly want to make sure it’s a help
to other people that is something that
we applaud you for and we are all
rooting for you would you guys agree
that we’re all
and we’re rooting for you we’re rooting
for you if you’re in a place in your
life where you are struggling with loss
whether it is a sudden loss or one that
you’ve kind of seen coming for a while
whether it was health issues or whatever
has been going on and you’re just
struggling to get out of bed and
struggling to move forward there is hope
Denise has shown us that there is hope
there is always hope in Jesus I want to
encourage you very practically to
discipline yourself to be grateful that
is so much of what I have heard her say
that just yep she’s cried and yes she
has lain prostrate on the floor yes she
said why God would you have allowed this
but in the next breath she has said
nevertheless I thank you because of who
you are and because of what you’ve done
and listen if you will look around you
you will see that there are miracles all
around you happening every single day
there is always something to be grateful
for gratitude will be the shovel that
starts to dig you out of that hole of
grief and hopelessness so listen this is
just part one of a conversation we’re
going to continue to have because
there’s a spectrum of grief that we kind
of want to deal with and talk about and
then we’re going to have a very wise
wise counselor here to help us to just
talk about how we not only personally
can deal with grief in our own lives but
then if we have people around us friends
of ours and they’ve had tragic losses
and we’re not sure what to say or how to
act or how to make sure we encourage
them in a way that will really be
healthy and helpful we’re going to be
able to get some wisdom on that as well
thank you so much for joining me and I
can’t wait to see you next time
Oh