In the third week of our series, Help I’m Hurting, we heard a powerful message from our very own Pastor Amberly Bell. Are you holding onto things you need to let go of? Today we learned that God can’t heal what you won’t reveal. If you feel like you are hoarding in your life, this message is for you. Check out this message and share it with someone in your life who needs to hear it!

well good morning good morning good

morning and welcome to transformation

church you guys today is the day that

the lord has made and i don’t know about

you but i am going to rejoice and be

glad in it

let me say that again today is the day

that the lord has made and i don’t know

about you but i’m gonna choose to

rejoice and be glad in it

if there is breath in your lungs if

there is fire in your soul if god

decided to wake you up this morning and

you have a roof over your head and close

on your back and breath in your very

lungs then i don’t know about you but

i’m gonna give glory to god this morning

we are so excited that you’ve decided to

join us this morning

this is going to be an incredible

service i just want to tell you right

now i’ve lost a lot of sleep okay

i’ve been fasting a lot so i’m working

on not a lot of food and not a lot of

sleep because god spoke this word so

heavy and so deep to me and told me that

you guys

not just you but can i be honest me

we have a culture of being humble open

and transparent so can i tell you that

even i need this word

that even i need the work that god’s

going to do this morning so i want to

introduce myself to you my name is

amberley

[Applause]

it’s great having friends in the

audience because they cheer you and clap

you on but listen right there on your

couch get to skip god some glory let’s

just give god the glory because he is

the one

he is the one that’s worthy to be

praised

honestly some of you may be asking who

is this girl where who’s the new girl

we’ve never seen her before i have the

honor and privilege of serving as one of

our executive pastors here at

transformation church and i love this

church

and i love this staff and you know who

else i love i love our lead pastors

let’s give it up right now for pastors

michael and natalie todd

they are they are away on sabbatical

getting refreshed and rejuvenated and

hearing the word from god and we just

want to tell them that we love them that

we’re praying for them that we believe

in them that we believe that all that

we’ve seen while it’s been crazy because

it’s only crazy till it happens that

this is truly the beginning of the best

days like our best days are truly ahead

of us and so pastors mike and natalie

and i we’ve done ministry now for over

a decade

wow like that’s 10 years that’s a lot of

years we’ve done ministry together in

some form or capacity and it’s been such

an honor and privilege to be on staff

now here at transformation church and to

be a part of this movement what a time

it is to be alive right so while they’re

getting refreshed we get to spring this

word to you and we are so honored and so

privileged to just have such amazing

amazing pastors

so listen i want to not only say thank

you to pastors mike and natalie todd

because honestly this takes a lot of

risk to put someone in your pulpit i

mean i could i could say something and

what are they really going to do

i mean they can be like oh god i mean

all the cameramen can start running and

all the things that are happening right

i everybody can start freaking out but

honestly the trust that it takes to put

someone in your space to trust that

they’re going to hear from god and to

speak that word so thank you thank you

pastor mike thank you pastor nat i love

you

and i have to give some honest thanks to

somebody else in the building today

there are founding pastors bishop

mcintosh and pastor debbie are in the

building

[Applause]

and honestly it was in may of 2008 so 13

years ago

that they recognized the call of god on

my life

and because they recognized it i’m

standing here today

and so while i give glory and honor to

god and while i thank our lead pastors i

would be remiss if i didn’t say thank

you to bishop mcintosh and pastor debbie

for believing in this little blonde girl

to come up and to preach a word

now listen i’m getting ready to tell

some really really good gossip about

myself are you ready

i just celebrated my 40th

birthday

[Applause]

y’all they say the 40’s the new 30. but

all i know is things are a little harder

to read things are a little harder to

understand and technology is a little

bit more complicated to operate

but 40 is the new 30 so here i am

i am married to the most amazing man of

god

[Applause]

[Music]

y’all listen i’ve said it once before

let me say it again don’t settle

don’t you dare settle on who god has

called you to marry because when you

wait for the one that god has appointed

for your future

it’s the most beautiful life now i’m not

saying there’s no hardship don’t get me

wrong we’ll talk about that in a minute

i’m not saying that the devil doesn’t

still come to come to steal kill and

destroy but when you’re married to the

right person when you’re in the right

unity when you’re yoked equally it makes

a difference and so

i am we we love each other we’re madly

in love with each other he’s amazing he

brings me coffee every morning at 5 28.

he props up my pillows he gives me my

bible he gives me my journal and he lets

me hear from god every single morning

and i am so grateful for him and

together we have created a beautiful

life and that’s that was a sweet way of

saying that yeah you know we did the

thing and we have the thing but anyways

um we have a daughter named mia and i’m

going to show you a picture of our

family mia is nine years old and she is

a fire

stick i don’t know who she gets it from

she’s sassy

she’s fierce she’s independent she wants

control she wants things to go a certain

way i really i think she gets it from

her father honestly

but literally we love and adore miabella

and not only am i a mom to that amazing

little girl but i get to be a stepmom to

our son jesse and to his wife samantha

and those three children are our

beautiful children that we love and we

are so grateful for so thankful for the

blessing of god in our lives

so that’s a little bit about my family

and you know it’s so funny because i

think about all the times that we think

about parenting we talk about parenting

right

and we can count all the things that we

do wrong as parents okay can i get

anyone in the chat being like it’s me

it’s me

i do a lot of things that i’m not proud

of when it comes to parenting like you

know you yell at your kids and you’re

like i shouldn’t have yelled or maybe

you you know i don’t know what you do

but i have had some parenting fails okay

but i want to take a moment if i may and

i want to just share with you a

parenting win if i can that i have this

week that gave me the energy to come

into this week okay so let me tell you

so my daughter had a friend stay the

night okay it’s one of our first summer

parties that we had and for those of you

who don’t know me on a personal level

like this i’m a little uh how do i say

this um

ocd i like things clean i like order i’m

an eight on the enneagram control

now i don’t want to control you but i

need to control my situation i need

everything to go a certain way we’ll

talk about that later too and so um i

keep everything very clean very tidy in

my house so much so that back in the day

that’s so sad that i have to say back in

the day back in the day i bought a

handheld vacuum cleaner and at every

stop light that i would stop at i would

turn around and vacuum the dust and the

debris out of the back of my car

okay i was that girl that when you would

turn at the stoplight i wasn’t picking

my nose but i was vacuuming my car out

who does that

well now in 2021 i don’t have to get the

vacuum cleaner and look like an idiot at

the stoplight i just bought a car wash

membership and i just go every single

day and i just vacuum out my car so i

can make sure that’s nice and clean okay

so pick up this little girl we take her

home with us to spend the night with us

and she gets in the car

and do y’all want to know what that

little girl said

she said to me about oh i heard i heard

moms hear all things and she said wow

this is the cleanest mom car i’ve ever

been in i said yeah you better believe

it’s the cleanest mom car you’ve ever

been in because it’s my car i keep my

car clean so parenting went now in this

same

in the same car ride i had another

parenting win listen y’all

there’s a lot of fails in parenting so

when you get some wins you got to take

them when they come right so in the same

token we’re pulling down the road and

this child pulls out and i say child he

was honestly 23 years old but it felt

like a child he pulled out on his bike

and pulled out in front of me and i

slammed on my brakes to keep from

hitting him right and when i did my

default thank god is not to cuss now i

know there’s a lot of us out there for

being humble open and transparent that

our default is to just cuss i didn’t

cuss i just went straight to tongues now

if you don’t know what that is you need

to go back and watch the series the

upgrade but i was just i mean instead of

hit that break and i started praying in

tongues and my daughter turns to this

little girl and she says oh don’t worry

anytime my mom’s getting ready to hit

something she always prays in tongues

i was like first of all i don’t hit that

many things and then i hear her say you

know what actually she prays in tongues

all the time don’t worry about it yeah

and i thought you know what for all the

things that i may not be doing right

there’s a few things that i might be

doing well okay

so i just want to encourage you parents

that are tuned in and watching you got

this

god already put inside of you everything

that you need to be the most amazing

mother the most amazing father maybe

some of you are being the grandma the

grandpa the auntie or the uncle right

now god knows exactly what you need and

he’s given you everything that you need

in this season so rest in that don’t

look around don’t don’t compare yourself

to other parents you be authentically

you and you raise that baby those

children the way that god has called you

to do it

so listen if you’re with me today we are

in a series called help

i’m hurting

and it’s week three wow and if you are

taking notes

the topic of today’s message is help

i’m hoarding

now let me give you a very basic

definition of you will of what hoarding

is

it’s just the inability to get rid of

stuff

now we’ve all seen that um show on h on

ae and tv the show hoarders it’s a

reality tv show that tells the stories

of these compulsive hoarders and their

family or friends that are attempting to

just do everything that they can in

their power to get them free from

hoarding

and it’s so easy

to watch those shows and say oh that is

so gross i could never live like that

how do they live like that

it would be so easy to judge and to say

how how would they be willing to let go

of their family for all this stuff they

would really be willing to give up their

kids and to lose their house for all

this stuff and it’s so easy for us to

sit in that space and to say i would no

that’s not me i couldn’t do that and

listen if you’re a hoarder and you’re

actually watching this message today

there’s no shame there’s freedom and

healing for you today too

but i want to do something a little

deeper today i want to talk about not

the things

not the things that you accumulate but i

want to talk about what about the things

inside of your heart

and your mind

those things

now listen you may be saying now pastor

everybody listen i’m a collector i’m a

collector but let me tell you something

collectors show off their stuff

hoarders hide

their stuff

and we learned last week that help i’m

hiding but you may be thinking well i’m

here to just show i’m just here to show

off what god’s doing i’m just here to

show off that i’m not going to be

treated that way because they did this

to me and i’m not about to let them

treat me that way so i’m going to show

the world that i can’t be taken

advantage of like that but what if i

told you that we are no different than

those people on that show

what if i told you we just don’t have

the a e people walking around with the

cameras and the hazmat crew ready to

clean out all of our junk when you see

all of this stuff

it’s easy to say that’s not my problem

but what’s locked inside your mind

and what’s locked inside your heart

let me let me back up here for a second

the thing about hoarding let me just

make some space here

the thing about hoarding is this

it starts slow

you don’t just wake up one morning and

all of this stuff has just showed up in

your house

it starts small it’s subtle

it’s kind of like the same thing as

drifting remember our word of the year

this year is anchored

we’re getting anchored in 2021 right

and you don’t just all of a sudden wake

up and one day you’re in the middle of

the ocean lacking an anchor that’s not

how that happens it’s a slow drift that

slowly you get off course slowly you get

away from what god has called you to do

slowly you move in a direction that you

know you’re not supposed to be moving in

and then all of a sudden you’re in the

deep and you realize i wasn’t prepared

to be in the deep

and it’s the same way you don’t we don’t

look inside your mind in your heart and

see all of this stuff it starts slowly

somebody hurts you as a young child and

you pick up something

then you go into eighth and ninth grade

and you’re that awkward age where people

are making fun of you and they’re

talking about you and your teeth aren’t

straight and you don’t have the right

brand of clothes and then you just kind

of pick that up small things along the

way

but then you get into high school and

you don’t become the prom queen you’re

not the homecoming queen you’re not what

you thought you would be and yet

everyone thinks that you’re just the

geeky person in high school then you go

to college not to really make much of a

name for yourself in college and you

just pick up little things

along

the way

until one day

you take and look back

and here it all is

it starts slow

in fact doesn’t the bible say in song of

songs

that it’s the little fox that spoils the

vine

pastor reed told us in the start of this

series that everybody is hurting

and it’s okay

and i’m here to tell you

we either all have hoarded

are hoarding or we will hoard

so if you’re taking notes i want you to

write down this point

point number one

fear

forces us to hold on

let me say that again for you

fear forces us to hold on

think about it when you go to six flags

or you go to an amusement park ride and

you get on the roller coaster and that

thing reaches the very very top and it’s

ready to come all the way down now

unless you’re certified crazy you’re you

know you’re the ones with your hands

raised up okay but for the rest of us

normal folks the rest of us that are

trying not to pee our pants we are

holding on for dear life because we are

terrified that at any moment if that

roller coaster goes off track we are

done for it

and i don’t know about you what kind of

home you grew up in but in the home i

grew up in i could be in the car next to

my mom driving and if she thought she

was getting ready to have a wreck unlike

mission praying tongues she just slammed

that hand across the passenger seat and

i’ll never forget the time that i caught

my mom doing that when i was in the back

seat there was no one even in the front

seat to protect but that fear of i gotta

protect my baby she threw that hand out

because fear

forces us to hold on

i mean i don’t know about you but how

many of you have been to a haunted house

as a grown

adult

and you will grab on to the youngest

child when that thing jumps out at you

with a spider to crawl down your back

you will not even think twice about

putting a seven-year-old in front of you

to shield you from the terrors of night

you don’t care what it is you are

holding on because you are

terrified

we hoard because we’re scared

we hold on because we’re scared

sometimes when we are afraid to hold on

fear is just a natural response

honestly there’s nothing wrong with

holding on i mean you’re kind of crazy

if you’re the one on the roller coaster

not holding on

you’re kind of crazy if you’re not the

one that’s not afraid in those types of

situations it’s okay it’s just that what

are you holding on to

that’s what you have to evaluate now

listen i want to read a passage of

scripture to you and i want to read it

this morning specifically out of the

message translation because i just feel

like it’s so

powerful so you have your bibles will

you do me a favor and will you turn with

me to matthew 25.

matthew chapter 25

while you’re turning there i just want

to say

ccnation we love you

we love that you tune in and you watch

every week and you share and you comment

thank you for blowing up the chat this

morning even we are honored and grateful

that people from all over the world are

joining us

so matthew 25 verses 14 is where i’m

gonna start okay

okay it says this

it’s also like a man going off on an

extended trip

he called his servants together and he

delegated responsibilities

to one he gave five thousand dollars

to another two thousand

to a third one thousand depending on

their abilities

then he left

right off the first servant went to work

and doubled his master’s investment

the second one did the exact same thing

but the man with the single thousand dug

a hole and carefully buried his master’s

money

after a long absence the master of those

three servants came back and settled up

with them

the one given five thousand dollars

showed him how he doubled his investment

his master commended him saying good

work you did your job well from now on

you be my partner

the servant with the 2000 showed how he

had also doubled his master’s investment

his master commended him good work

you did your job well from now on you

can be my partner

the servant given one thousand said

master i know you have high standards

and you hate careless ways that you

demand the best and you make no

allowances for error

i was afraid

and hid it

here it is safe and sound down to the

very last cent the master was furious

that is a terrible way to live it is

criminal to live cautiously like that if

you knew i was after the best why did

you do less than the least

the least you could have done is taken

it to the bank and invested that some

with the bankers where i would have at

least gotten a little bit of interest

take the thousand and give it to the one

who risked the most

it says the third man hoarded the 1000

that he was given or in other

translations you may read it as one

talent equivalating to maybe a thousand

dollars in current day time

but hoarded the one and here’s the thing

the bible doesn’t tell us for how long

did he hoard the one talent

how i mean for any of you who have any

money savvy at all savviness you know

that money if you put it in a bank it

can accrue interest and over time that

you could potentially live off of that

money so what did he miss out by keeping

that one hidden

and the bible’s so clear it says he was

afraid and hid it

so i think the problem with hoarding is

this we hoard because we think what if i

need that stuff again

you get scared because what happens if

you get rid of it and you end up needing

it later

okay i’m gonna get in your business

right now there are so many of you

me included

that you have a closet full of quote

unquote skinny clothes

oh you know

you know you turned that person next to

you on the couch you’re like yeah that’s

me i got skinny clothes you’ve got these

skinny clothes that you’re hoarding

because you’re afraid if i were to ever

get back down to that size i may not

have clothes away and i really liked the

way i looked in that jacket so i’m going

to keep it just in case i ever get to be

skinny again

now the problem with that is by the time

you got skinny okay let me say me by the

time i got skinny again those clothes

aren’t even going to be in style anyways

and yet that’s how ridiculous we look we

hold on all of this stuff that by the

time it really came to fruition it would

look ridiculous on us

and i realized when i found out that i

was going to be preaching on help i’m

hoarding i thought to myself you have

picked the wrong person

i mean i i vacuum my car

at stoplights i am committed to

cleanliness cleanliness is next to

godliness

okay

you have picked the wrong person

and i remember thinking like there’s no

way i could live like this

this is disgusting

and god was like uh check yourself

check your own hearts check your own

motives amberly

and so i’m here to confess something to

you

my daughter is nine years old

she is an absolute joy to our lives

and after having mia we tried to have

more children after her

only to bury three babies after mia

and i thought by holding on to all of

her baby bottles

and all of her baby clothes

and all of her baby bibs

and all of her formula containers

and all of her toys

that i could that i could somehow make

myself have another baby again because

if i i can’t get rid of it because what

if

what if i were to have another baby

i would want that stuff i wouldn’t want

to have to go and buy that stuff again

and i realized in preparing for this

message that it was time to let that

stuff go

and so i would love to tell you that i

came to this realization years ago but

honestly

three months ago

three months ago is when i got rid of

all of mia’s baby stuff because i

decided god

you supply everything if we need more

baby bottles god you’re gonna supply the

baby bottles god if we need more formula

containers you’ll supply more formula

containers

people horde out of fear i think even

people hoard money out of fear

they know god’s asking them to be

generous and to bless but that fear of

like what happens if i really need that

money i really need my paycheck to get

me through and so out of fear they hoard

it

we hoard and we hold on to our emotions

because we think that our friends and

our family wouldn’t be able to handle if

we told them how we really felt

even you yourself

you hoard yourself from you because

you’re not even really sure if you could

handle who you really are

truthfully you hoard out of fear and at

the very core of that fear is a lack of

trust

in god

for some of you the thought of trusting

god is a real battle you struggle

trusting that god’s provision will be

enough that it will come when you need

it and it will actually be what you need

when you need it but can i tell you

something he’s the one whose thoughts

are higher than our thoughts he’s the

one who says my ways are higher than

your ways he’s the one that says i have

a plan to prosper and not to harm you to

give you a hope and a future that i am

the lord god your healer that i can make

the crooked path straight

he is the one who supplies all of your

needs according to his riches and glory

in christ jesus

but what about the things that we hoard

that aren’t tangible

what about the things that i mentioned

that are the at the heart and the mind

and the core of who you are

no i i’m specifically talking about um

control

let’s talk about control for a second

praise god

no one can stand to be around you type

of control

because if plans don’t go a and b kind

of way then you can see yourself later

that type of control

you know the type of control that um

when you were a child

you saw

your mom act a fool when things didn’t

go her way

you watched her lose her ever-loving

mind

and you made an inner vow saying i will

never allow myself to act like her and

all you’ve really done is horde control

because as long as you can control your

emotions everything is fine because if

you allowed yourself to really feel then

what would happen

you’re actually scared that someone who

looks and sounds like your mama might

come out so you hoard control tight you

won’t let it go

now what about how you hoard your past

you wouldn’t dare tell anyone

what you’ve actually done

i mean you don’t really want everyone

knowing what you did when you’re in

college right

you wouldn’t want your spouse to really

know you know when you exchanged the

number of how many people you slept with

and you didn’t really tell the truth

about that number

you wouldn’t want to actually tell that

number would you

you wouldn’t want to actually tell your

children that they have siblings in

heaven because in your freshman year of

college you chose to abort a baby

so instead of talking about it you just

hoard it if i can just keep it a little

closer then no one will know and it’s

it’s fine everything’s it’s fine

everything’s fine i’m good

it’s the non-tangible items i’m not

talking about the stuff that fills up

your house i’m talking about the stuff

that fills up your heart

that kind of stuff

or what about your desires and your

purpose

what about those

you know

the kind of things that um

if you really told anyone what you felt

like god had called you to do

they might disown you

if you actually admitted to your dad you

don’t want to run the family business

and that you actually feel called to be

a teacher

but all you’ve heard your whole life is

your dad saying they don’t make any

money boy you don’t want to be a teacher

and all you hear your mom say is baby

it’s so dangerous in those schools these

days you probably shouldn’t be teaching

so what if instead of moving into

purpose you just hoard it

never truly becoming who you know god

has called you to become and never fully

reaching your god-given potential

these are the things i’m talking about

not tangible the things that nobody can

see you and god and that’s it

what about um childhood trauma

yeah it gets real quiet it’s real quiet

today real real quiet

let me just

let me just

get my childhood trauma here

okay

okay yeah i’ve it’s good i’m no i’m fine

i’ve got it

it’s the childhood trauma of

yeah i was molested as a little girl

yeah i was taken advantage of

maybe you’re the one who had a cousin

who crept in the room in the middle of

the night to fondle you

but let me be clear i’m not just talking

about the obvious trauma

i’m not talking about the ones that we

classically defined by a dictionary as

childhood trauma child abuse molestation

rejection

but i’m talking about what if your whole

life

all your mom ever did was right in a

birthday card i’m proud of you mom

and you actually never heard her echo

not even a whisper

of i’m proud of you

and so to this day you don’t really know

if anyone’s even proud of you

because you never actually heard the

words come out of your mother or your

father or your dad or your coach or

whomever’s mouth saying i’m

proud of you

you just read it

or what about if you had that really

present father who attended every

sporting event he was at every game but

dear god at every single game he made

you look like a fool the way he yelled

and while he was there oh he was present

but while he was there the way he was

yelling you to get behind that base and

to hit that ball and the way he was

yelling at the coaches no he’s yelling

at the refs and it made you wonder do i

measure up

am i good enough

am i worthy

enough so fear

forces us to hold on

tight

tight

and it’s it’s the obvious it’s the

obvious response but it’s not the right

thing to hold on to

you’re holding on to the wrong thing

now listen

second thing if you’re taking notes is

this

hoarding hinders obedience

let me just say it very plainly

hoarding hinders obedience

now listen let me show you visually what

i mean because maybe it’ll help some of

you kind of understand what

i’m okay hold on just

okay yeah

yeah okay so

here i am

and god where is god god where are you

there he is

and i know that god is calling me to

something

i know that god has a call on my life he

has plans and he has purposes for me and

he’s calling me to come

there’s an opportunity knocking at the

door and he’s saying just come to me all

you who are weary and heavy burden he’s

saying come to me and i will give you

the rest and the joy and the

satisfaction that you need and instead

you’re like

okay

just get god just

yeah oh yeah

god um

i’m coming

just i’m coming the problem is is this

there’s some stuff in the way

and

i’m so i’m so i really i really want i

it sounds like i could do this i i hear

your voice it’s not that i can’t hear

your voice it’s just that i can’t get to

you because all of this stuff is in the

way

and so instead of moving it and removing

it which is clearly the obvious thing to

do instead i’ll say let me just be a

traveling hoarder god just hold on one

second god just let me

let me just hold on i just

god just hold on one second i

need to get my

desires

and

i’m just not

i’m not really sh yeah okay i’ll be

there in just a minute i just i i don’t

think i can go without all this stuff

because it’s all i’ve ever known

[Music]

[Applause]

and so instead of the show hoarders

maybe it’s hoarders on the go because i

can’t i can’t get to you without

bringing all of this with me

and the beautiful thing about this is he

wants you

he wants you to bring all of it with you

he wants you to let go of your

bitterness and your insecurity and the

thing is the reason we have to deal with

our hurt and our hoarding is because

hoarding helps the enemy but it hinders

god

oh the enemy’s satisfied right now he’s

completely and totally satisfied i can’t

get to where i need to be i can’t get to

my full potential he’s 100 satisfied the

enemy comes to steal kill and destroy

and by god he’ll kill steal and destroy

everything in me but god comes to give

us life and life in abundance

[Music]

[Applause]

so the enemy keeps us alone and isolated

feeling too overwhelmed to fix it and

honestly

too embarrassed to even ask for help

it’s hindering god from taking us where

we want to be

if you’re hoarding you’ll live the

majority of your life alone and isolated

because you don’t want people to see the

truth about your life but you can’t heal

from what you won’t reveal and you

need community

we help the enemy because he knows the

word says in ecclesiastes 4 2 are better

than one if either one of them falls

down one can help the other up

now listen think about this for just a

second what if

what if the one servant

who was so afraid and went and hid his

one talent

actually went to the other two and said

i don’t know what i’m doing

i’ve never done this before

i’ve never been in a place to have to

take a risk to turn my investment into

something else would you come and help

me

what if he hadn’t stayed alone and

scared and reached out to the other two

and said i’ve never been down this road

before but i know you have and if god

can do it for you certainly he can do it

for me

but instead this is what we do we put

ourselves in a corner

we put ourselves in the corner

and we sit by ourselves isolated

alone

but this

this is why

you have to be hot

humble

open and transparent

you need friends

who will come alongside you

who will come and they will see

because you think see here’s the thing

about hoarding you think no one really

can see all this

but honestly they can

they know something’s not right about

you and you need friends who will come

alongside you when you can’t do it on

your own

when you can’t survive on your own

community that will come alongside you

and you can say but i i this is not this

is not the one that i want i can’t i

can’t bree

i can’t

i can’t

but if you

are all alone

and all by yourself

and leave yourself to your own emotions

and your own thoughts

god can’t heal what you won’t reveal

hoarding

hinders

god but helps the enemy

listen i want to tell you just

a real life story because i feel like

sometimes it’s really easy to think that

people who who preach and teach have it

all together and i’ve loved all of the

marketing that we’ve done for this

series because it makes us look like

we’re all put together

but we’re all we all got stuff okay we

all got issues

and um i’ll never forget that um when

pastor bree called and offered me this

job here at transformation church she

and i’ve been dear friends for years and

so i

it was an easy phone call

but as most of you have heard before i

spent a great deal of time prior to

coming on churches on staff here at the

church doing real estate

and while i was rising to the top and i

was making a lot of money and i was very

successful

and i thought i was doing and in a in a

way it was ministry and it still is

ministry i’m able to help people make a

really big financial decision in their

lives

but what i didn’t realize it was doing

was it was teaching me how to harden my

heart

i thought on the outside it was success

i mean i had the power suits

i had i had all i had the car i had the

money had all the things had the trips

had the vacations

but but what i didn’t realize was my

heart was becoming hard

so when pastor brie called and asked me

if i wanted to take this job and just

what this job would entail there was a

part of me that was like

i

wha what are you not telling me because

see in real estate deals can be on and

deals can be off things can go well

things can go bad and it happens in the

in this drop of a hat you can think that

you’re going to the closing table and

getting a make bank only to find out you

ain’t going nowhere but to the bank to

put money in your overdrawn account

i mean that’s real

and so i had learned to hold all of my

transactions at arm’s length

because if you decided you didn’t want

to use me as your realtor if you decided

you didn’t want to buy that house if you

decided that this wasn’t the buyer’s

remorse then if i had held you at arm’s

length then it didn’t hurt when you let

me go

and so i learned to hold everything at

arm’s length so much so that when pastor

bree called i treated it as a business

transaction

not as the call of god on my life not as

the purpose and the potential and the

and the thing that i’ve been believing

and praying to happen in my life for the

last 20 years

instead i said um

because what if you change your mind

what if you decide i’m not the one that

you want for the job if i keep you here

then it doesn’t hurt as bad the problem

is i was hoarding my own true feelings

and my own emotions

and i’ll never forget i went to dinner

with my husband

and

he’s so good

he’s so fine too anyways um

oh he’s so handsome he’s been growing a

beard and oh so it’s i love it anyways

um

he uh

he said to me he’s like so babe what are

you thinking about this job

i said babe i i don’t know i just you

know what if they you know change their

mind what if they decide i’m not the one

what if i’m not good enough what if i’m

not you know what if what if what if

what if what if

and he said

what have you been doing and i said

honestly honey i’ve been kind of holding

it at arm’s length because if they

change their mind and and i decide to

they decide to say no then it’s like

cool just water off the ducks back

and he’s like but how do you actually

really feel

oh

i mean that’s what i’m saying like if

they decide i’m cool i’m not the one

he’s like no babe

how do you actually really feel about

this

and i said to him i said i feel called

to this more than i’ve ever felt called

to anything in my entire life i know

this is what god has called me to i know

this is the plan and the purpose he has

for my life and he said i think you

should say that out loud

and i was like no because i feel like if

i tell pastor mike investor breathe and

it’s like what if they change my he’s

like no i think i think it’s okay to say

how you really feel out loud

so i kid you not i literally

that night sent the text to pastor mike

and i said hey

been realizing i’ve been treating this

as a business deal bree was in on the

text i mean holding it at arm’s length

and i just want to say as awkward as

this is for me to admit i want this

because i know this is what god wants

and literally within two seconds pastor

mike had texted back and he’s like come

back tomorrow and sign your offer letter

it was once i revealed my true emotions

that god was actually able to move

but hoarding if you’re not careful

can hinder obedience

now listen the third thing i want you to

know is this

to stop hoarding you have to forget what

if

and focus on what is

let me say that again to stop hoarding

you have to forget what if

and focus on what is

now let me tell you something elsa how

many of you have seen frozen

because i’m about to come for elsa’s

back okay

elsa tried to teach us this beautiful

little song let it go

let it go

and then that’s what we say when things

bother us i’m just gonna let it go

let it go and her just her dress just

flaps in the wind elsa just says let it

go

and it’s interesting because the last

sentence of that song says the cold

never bother me anyways

and the music just goes

but guess what elsa played us

she has lied to us

she made all of us think that you could

just let it go and then nothing would

bother you and you know come on you know

the truth bothered or the cold actually

bothered elsa really hell said the cold

never bothered you let me ask you

questions have you ever stepped out in

the cold and it not bothered you

you know the cold bothered you

but but in her attempt to control the

situation around her she ended up alone

and isolated from everyone she knew

because the truth is the cold does

bother us

you can sing let it go all you want you

tell yourself just push it down push

push push those feelings down just push

it down but the reality is it did hurt

it does hurt

it did hurt when he promised you forever

and he walked out on you and left you

with those kids

it did hurt

when they committed to being your

business partner

and instead of being a business partner

they took everything that you had and

then ruined your name to all of the

other business partners and to all of

your families and all of your friends

where now you have no business no family

and no friends it did hurt

the reality is that it did hurt when you

trusted and you confided in that church

leader and they went around and gossiped

about you and talked about you in a way

that you know wasn’t the truth

the fact of the matter is it did hurt

when they picked someone who wasn’t

nearly as qualified as you or as

reliable as you didn’t show up on time

like you do for the promotion it did

hurt

and i just want to say this to you

if no one in your life has ever

validated this

we see

and we know it hurt

and the cold

it does bother you

and in case no one’s ever validated or

acknowledged that there’s parts of your

personality that you just won’t give up

because of all this stuff inside of you

or maybe there’s a love that you just

can’t quite extend to your spouse and

your children i want you to say i see it

i see you’re hurt

i see you’re hoarding and killing what

else i want to say to you i’m sorry

because here’s the real reality no one

ever bothered to ask you why

why are you hoarding why do you get so

angry when those types of things happen

why do you let yourself act like that in

these situations

why do you turn off your brain in your

heart when you’re in a situation like

this why can’t you let yourself really

love no one has asked you why instead

they’ve just talked about you behind

your back

no one’s ever given you the time to say

why i see the anger i see the

frustration i see the pain i see the

hurt but why

and i just want to say to you today i’m

so sorry

i am so sorry

because your feelings do matter those

things do those those frustrations those

feelings those situations those

circumstances they matter and you matter

people have seen the way that you act

but if you’ve never taken the time to

ask why

why is that

and i just this morning i want to

acknowledge it

and even though everyone thought that

you were crazy they all thought you were

crazy i’m here to say you’re not

i’m here to tell you that i know it

hurts

i know it’s painful

but i’m gonna ask all of us to do

something this morning

something a little uncomfortable

something that may feel a little foreign

something that may feel a little off

from what you’re used to but i’m gonna

ask you to take

a risk

turn to the person sitting next to you

or the person on the couch or in your

car even if there’s nobody next you just

say i’m gonna take a risk today

and i know what you’re thinking pastor

you’re saying pastor really listen

i uh i don’t i don’t know about this

whole risk thing i don’t know if i can

do this whole risk thing

what if tomorrow morning i wake up and i

still feel the same way what if i give

all of this energy and nothing changes i

just want to beg you take

the risk

the way to stop hoarding is to take a

risk

and let me tell you this a risk involves

uncertainty about the effects or the

implications

in watching the show hoarders i watch

time and time again these people

struggling with hoarding and struggling

to let someone clean it out because the

risk was how would they feel afterwards

would it actually work would their kids

actually come back home would their

marriage actually be restored would they

actually get to keep their house would

they be able to function and go back to

normal life again

and it’s funny because at a young age

the first thing that we’re taught one of

the first principles we’re taught as

children and that we as parents teach

our children is to share and i believe

the opposite of hoarding is sharing

it’s the first principle that we teach i

mean you teach your kids to share their

crayons to share their toys to not be a

jerk to play with little tommy all it’s

one of the first things that you teach

them

and yet somewhere along the way someone

has taken advantage of that

you’ve been misunderstood you’ve been

abused you’ve been talked about and now

instead of sharing the good the bad the

indifferent or whatever the case may be

you don’t even feel that you could take

a risk because of what the outcome could

or could not be

but today i’m asking you

be willing to take the risk

it’s interesting because when you read

about the children of israel in exodus

chapter 16

they’re in the desert and they’re

complaining about not having food to eat

and so god says i’ll take care of them

okay i’ll take care of what they need

and so he provides quail in them in the

night and bread manna in the morning and

every morning when they woke up they

looked out and they saw the camp covered

with what looked like dew but it was

actually man it was bred to supply their

daily needs

and the interesting thing about the

bible is it says that he sustained them

in this manner for 40 years

and yet still

every single day they got up and walked

out and had to take a risk would the

mana actually be there would god

actually do what he said he would do

would he actually provide in the way

that he said he would provide

and the interesting thing about that

manna is even in the midst of the 40

years of god every day showing up and

doing exactly what he said he would do

they still hoarded it

god said take only what you need every

single day and on the days that they

tried to take more it rotted and it

spoiled and it stunk and it was of no

value but interestingly enough on the

sixth day he says go ahead and take

enough for your sabbath and that portion

didn’t spoil it didn’t rot it didn’t

stink

and so when you take the risk

when you take the risk

you tap in

to a measure of god

that you wouldn’t know otherwise

a measure you wouldn’t know if you

didn’t take it anyways now let me tell

you what i see when i mean risk i want

to spell this out for you

it’s an acronym

the first letter is r

and it’s release

you have to release your control

god can’t heal as long as you’re the one

that’s in control if i’m the one

steering this ship

let me show you something here

if i am the one

in the deep holding all this stuff

what happens is

there’s an anchor that i clearly need to

drop

but because i can’t release

my control

and i can’t i need to drop the anchor

because i’m drifting and things are out

of control and i need to but i can’t

because i’ve not released all of the

control that i’m holding onto

and so when you release it to god

then it allows you to drop the anchor

the iron risk is to identify hurt go

back and answer the question why

did i start hoarding

where did this come from

why do i feel this way you see

self-awareness is being aware of you

and that is where true growth and

freedom actually take place

you have to be aware of what you do why

you do what you do when you do and how

you do it and the truth is what sets

people free

why is it ask yourself go all the way

back to your childhood pastor bray dear

god every time we have a meeting with

her she’s always saying hey really what

in your childhood is causing this in you

nothing in my childhood is causing this

and me

but the reality is everything in my

childhood is causing me to act this way

because when you show up the little kid

version of you shows up everywhere you

go and whether you had a good childhood

or a bad childhood you were entitled or

you had nothing it all shows up with you

you have to identify that hurt

the s in risk is you have to surrender

the pain

admitting that you can’t do this and you

need god’s help

you’re tired you’ve worn out you’re

overwhelmed and you’re surrendering

saying god take this

i can’t do this i’m done hoarding i’m

done holding onto things that i was

never designed to carry

because you see when you’re walking

brenton come back up here for a second

the difference between brentham and i

well there’s a lot of differences

honestly

but um

we will won’t go there today

but uh

the difference between god and i

is a

i wasn’t built

to carry this

i i mean i

this is absurd that i would try to walk

through life carrying all of this

i’m not des i wasn’t equipped i wasn’t

formed i wasn’t fashioned in my mother’s

womb to carry this kind of stuff

and as i go through life and i keep

trying to just

pick up things

oh come on childhood trauma i need you

and this next season that i’m going into

the reality is god

he can

look at the difference and when i try to

hold all this

and god takes it

i was never designed to carry it

he was

we have to surrender

the pain

and the k

in risk

thank you

is that we have to know the promise

and you say know the promise what does

that mean pastor let me tell you what

that means

it means there are promises found all

throughout scripture that tell you how

good your god is that tells you how god

will take care of you promises such as

that you can cast all of your cares upon

him because he cares for you the promise

that you’re forgetting the former things

that you’re not dwelling on the past

because he is doing a new thing the

promise that if god is for before me who

then can be against me the promise that

everything in comparison to the lord is

meaningless it’s rubbish the apostle

paul says the promise that i can

overcome the enemy by the blood of the

lamb and by the word of my testimony

the promise that if i store up treasures

in heaven instead of of earth that

mosque and rust can’t destroy them and

that no one can steal them from me

the promise that even though i walk

through the valley of the shadow of

death i don’t have to fear evil

because he is with me and surely

surely

goodness and mercy will follow me all

the days of my lives

those are the promises that we cling to

not to the past not to the hurt not to

the fear but to the promises and here’s

why we have to take the risk

god always restores to you more than you

lose and he resupplies much more than

you give away

let me say that again the reason why you

have to take the risk is that god always

restores to you more than you lose and

he resupplies to you so much more than

you give away because you see in the

kingdom of god it’s opposite it’s

opposite of everything that you know you

have to die in order to live it’s the

paradox of purpose

it’s that you have to give in order to

have more that you have to believe you

have to have the faith he always

restores and so instead of hoarding

instead of being afraid and bearing

those emotions and those feelings and

those past and even your finances

you have to be willing to say god i know

that the kingdom of man is opposite than

the kingdom of god and that in the

kingdom of god there’s nothing but light

and everything that’s in the dark will

have to be brought to the light

and that he restores to you more than

you lose and resupplies much more than

you could ever

give away

you know the interesting thing as i’m

just closing out here

is that in all of my studying of orders

it was an interesting journey that i

went on

i learned something very powerful

that recurrence is a hundred percent

without proper therapy

let me say that

again recurrence is a hundred percent

without proper

therapy

you see they come in and they clean out

these people’s house and they make them

throw away all of these old

boxes of pizza and collectibles and

items and dead animals and this and that

and at the end of the day they walk back

in the camera crew walks back in and

it’s clean and it’s empty and it’s

beautiful and the children come home and

the husband returns and the house is no

longer foreclosed on and it’s a

beautiful scene but the problem is

there was no proper therapy

sure a therapist showed up on the scene

one time you went to counseling one time

okay maybe you went three

but the problem is is that reoccurrence

your hoarding issue will continue a

hundred times over and over and over

again without proper therapy and what is

that proper therapy

it’s it’s realizing it’s recognizing

that you have to let go of control

it’s understanding you have to identify

that hurt you have to surrender the pain

and you have to know the promises of god

you have to know what he’s called you to

you have to know what he’s called you to

carry and what he’s not called you to

carry you know there are some burdens

that some of you are carrying right now

by the power of the holy spirit that you

were not designed to carry but because

you’re the one in that situation and

you’re the adult in that situation

you’ve you’ve said i have to carry this

you aren’t designed baby to carry that

and you have to let that thing go

in the name of jesus you let it go and

you don’t try to tell everybody the call

never yeah it’s okay to admit the call

bothers you that’s why we have

therapists that’s why we have community

that’s why we have a church that’s why

we need each other

because what we’re going through is too

hefty we need each other

so today i want to make it really really

clear to you

that as christians we’ve all got stuff

none of us is any different than the

other there are issues in each one of

our lives as long as we’re living to

bring glory and honor to god he is going

to continually convict our hearts of

things that we need to address and

things that we need to change

and the thing about sin and the way it

works is it never starts big

it’s not one day you just wake up and

kill somebody

it starts little

it’s little sin

and so i don’t know where you are today

i don’t know

what those sins look like in your life

i don’t know if they’re little right now

if they’re medium size if they’re big

size i i don’t know what you did last

night only you and the holy spirit knows

that but here’s what i do know it

doesn’t matter

today

is a day of freedom

i feel this so strongly

that to everyone who’s under the sound

of my voice which is only the sound and

the voice of the holy ghost

that there is freedom today for you

there are things that you have held onto

for years

it’s real

it’s

real

but god

wants to heal you today

he wants to restore to you everything

that the locusts have eaten

and destroyed

and if you’re watching and you’re like i

am so lost that’s really i don’t even

know where to begin

can i just tell you he loves you

he’s been chasing wildly after you every

day from the moment you entered this

earth

and he wants to clean all this out

he’s the one who’s designed to carry all

of those problems and all of those

issues

he’s the one and he wants to do that for

you this morning

and so this morning if you say i’ve i’ve

never

in my life made the decision to really

truly make jesus the lord of my life i

want to explain that to you for just a

second

when we talk about making jesus the lord

of our lives the best way that i can

think about that is a landlord

many of you either have rented or are

currently renting and you know when

something goes wrong you call your

landlord you don’t try to fix the sink

the garbage disposal you don’t try to

fix the when the when there’s roaches

crawling in the apartment you call the

landlord and he fixes everything

and when i was little i used to think

that making jesus the lord of my life

meant that he had control and he had say

and whatever he says is what went and i

really truly believe that that’s what

that was and what i’ve learned in my

time of walking with jesus

is that it’s not that he’s lording over

me it’s not that he’s do it this way

amber earlier you won’t have this or you

can’t get this it’s not that it’s just

that he’s saying i’m here

when things aren’t right

when it when the sink doesn’t operate

right

when the toilet won’t flush

i’m just just i call me i’m here

he’s not here to to demean you or to

belittle you or to grade you or to cause

you to walk in shame the book of romans

says there is no condemnation for those

who are in christ jesus and i believe

today there are going to be hundreds of

people

who make the decision to make jesus

christ the lord of their life because

you two were like me you used to think

that that meant that he was going to be

holding you down with the sum on you

telling you how to do it this way and if

you didn’t do it this way then you

couldn’t become anything that’s not who

god is

now he has plans and purposes for you

but he lets you make that choice

yourself

so this morning you’re a group of people

that i want to pray for

and the other group of people that i

want to pray for this morning is the

people that the moment that uh that

opening scene came on and we said help

i’m hoarding you immediately were like

that is that’s not me that’s not me

but through this message the holy spirit

has made you realize

yeah that’s that’s actually really me

and maybe it wasn’t the issues that we

talked about maybe it wasn’t control

maybe it wasn’t past maybe it wasn’t

your desires or your purpose maybe it’s

truly something else maybe it’s not

maybe you didn’t have childhood trauma

like i did maybe that’s the case

but god desires to get all of it out

all of it

to make you free because where you’re

going

this

can’t go with you

there’s not room for you and it

there’s only room for you and him and

not all of this

so today i’m begging you

will you take a risk

risk that there’s not a sure outcome of

what it looks like the difference

between a risk and investing your money

and a risk at the casinos

is that in this risk when you bet on god

when you put your risk on him he has to

do what he says he will do the bible

says that he is the son of god he is not

a man that he can lie

there is no lying in his vocabulary he’s

the author and the finisher of our faith

the beginning and the end alpha and

omega jehovah jireh jehovah shalom he is

your provider

and so today i want to pray for you

wherever you are wherever you whatever

situation you find yourself sitting in

will you just put your own hands across

your heart wherever you are all over the

world

god i just thank you that you are making

us aware of ourselves right now in this

moment

god i thank you that you’re bringing up

right now by the power of the holy

spirit things that maybe we’ve never

even thought of things that we just saw

it was just normal to walk through life

with that issues that we thought it was

just that’s just the way it’s supposed

to be god i thank you that right now

you’re making us aware of those

situations

and that god today we’re willing to take

a risk because it’s not a risk that we

have to wonder what the outcome will be

but that it’s a risk that’s guaranteed

that’s signed sealed and delivered by

the holy ghost himself

and so god i thank you that people all

over the world this morning

are taking a risk

as scary

as unsure

as uncertain as it may be god they’re

taking

a risk

if that’s you this morning will you do

me a favor

will you just type in the chat i’m

taking a risk

because you know what you need to be

celebrated

there’s it takes a lot of boldness and a

lot of guts to say i’m willing to step

out and take the risk

and i just want you to know you’re not

alone there are there’s a chat room full

of people that want to pray with you

that want to intercede with you that

want to walk alongside this journey with

you you aren’t alone in this

and for those of you that that you’ve

never made jesus the lord of your life

you’ve never committed to making him the

landlord if you will that when things go

wrong you know he’s the one that you can

call on then today is your day of

salvation

[Music]

all across the building and all over the

world will you repeat this prayer with

me if you would like to make jesus the

lord of your life

dear god

thank you for loving me

thank you for sending your son to die

for me

jesus thank you for laying down your

life to save mine

[Music]

i admit i’ve made mistakes

i pray you would save me

transform me

and change me

in the mighty name of jesus

amen and amen

[Applause]

listen if you have made that decision to

make jesus christ the lord of your life

if you’ve decided this morning that i’m

done with all of this stuff all of this

all of these issues if today is that day

will you do us a favor and will you text

the word saved to a2 a2 a2

it’s going to be here at the bottom of

the screen we just want to connect you

with your next steps we are so excited

for you in this next season of your life

with christ

i promise it won’t be easy but it will

be worth it all

just like i said the apostle paul that

says everything pales in comparison to

jesus

i don’t want to sugarcoat it and tell

you that everything’s going to be

perfect but i want to tell you it will

be amazing

walking with jesus all the days of your

lives is the best decision you can ever

make we are so excited for you for this

new life in christ

now listen we love you we want you to

continue to pray for our lead pastors as

they’re on sabbatical they need our

prayers they covet our prayers we are

excited the words that they’re going to

bring back in in this next season so

continue to lift them up continue to

pray for them continue to shout them out

on social media and let them know how

much you love and you honor them

listen we love you don’t forget to come

back for next week you don’t want to

miss next week’s series of this thing

that we’re calling help i’m hurting it’s

going to be amazing we love you

god loves you go out and live a

transformed life

[Applause]