Candid Conversations 4: Joyce’s Recovery and Setbacks She Faced
If you or anyone you know is in need of emotional healing, this episode of Candid Conversations with Joyce can help you discover what challenges you might face to experience healing in this area. Watch as Joyce gets real with the areas that have been hardest for her to get past in this important episode of Candid Conversations with Joyce.
Joyce Meyer, one of the world’s leading practical Bible teachers and New York Times best-selling author, shares encouragement and advice to help us enjoy our daily lives.
With a heart to share Christ and love people, Joyce’s messages help people in all walks of life to grow in their faith, learn to study the Bible, find healing from the wounds of life, get answers to life’s questions and encounter the love of God in a powerful way.
[Music]
join us today in our candid conversation
where we talk a little bit more
intimately i i know that you are
speaking to many people who are watching
who are going down the path of emotional
healing
that you’ve been down so i would love to
talk about some of those things that you
faced
that were the most difficult challenges
that maybe would encourage other people
that they’re going to make it through
those hard times too
well i think the one of the first things
i would say is that
it’s really hard to face the truth about
your own behavior
you know for so many years i blamed
my bad behavior on the fact that i’d
been abused
and i used that as an excuse
i mean everything from fits of self-pity
to whatever i would just say well if
only i wouldn’t have been
abused and you know as long as you’re
making excuses for something
you can’t get free from it now i want to
say that again
as long as we’re making excuses for
something
we can’t get free from it because we’re
giving ourselves permission
to keep it so excuses like
it’s not my fault it’s not my fault i
deserve to feel this way
it’s because i was abused anybody that’s
been through what i’ve been through
would behave this way yeah and uh i had
a real problem with self-pity
i mean among many other things but i
particularly had a problem with
every time things didn’t go my way or
i didn’t feel like dave was paying
enough attention to me or whatever i
would
sit and feel sorry for myself and
you know god spoke to me you can be
pitiful or powerful but you can’t be
both i was trying to minister already
and
you know i’d be in the pulpit talking
about
being a powerful woman and yet having
these
pity parties and i said well you know
you know how we talk to the lord i mean
i said well i
anybody would feel sorry for themselves
that they’ve been through what i’ve been
right and
he said well you have a reason
but don’t let the reason become an
excuse
to stay that way so how is that
affecting you behind the scenes
you’d be on stage and and you know
you’re teaching and god is using it
but what’s happening at home well that’s
what i’m saying you know at home i would
be
i mean not a totally different person
but i would
the thing that happened with me a lot is
what god was teaching me
is what i would be preaching one lady
said you’re just letting us eat off your
plate
so sometimes i was teaching people but
it wasn’t yet perfected in my own life
and the bible says in john 8 that
if you continue in my word you will know
the truth
and the truth will make you free
but it’s the truth applied
that makes you free so you know just to
those that are
watching today the first thing that you
might want to pay attention to
is am i stuck in a place because i just
keep making excuses for it
are blaming you know blaming everybody
else and so really
no matter what you do or you do or you
do
i’m still responsible for my own
behavior
even if somebody doesn’t treat me right
i’m still responsible for
my attitude toward them yeah and that’s
hard
and that’s true for for everybody yeah
it’s i mean it’s it’s easy to face truth
about somebody else how often do we hear
a message and think well yeah so-and-so
really needs this
when really we’re the one that that
needs it right
some of the things that were the most
challenging for me was
learning how to
be a submissive wife you know
and you know not in a weird way where i
had no
mind of my own or no choices or you know
where dave was trying to control me
because he’s not even the kind of person
to do that
but i just because i’d been mistreated
by men
i didn’t have respect for men it makes a
lot of sense yeah and i didn’t
i didn’t trust like if a decision needed
to be made
i didn’t know how to trust that dave
would make a good decision for
me as well as him because i
men had always used me and so i didn’t
it was very hard for me to believe
that you’ll make a decision that’s in my
best interest
and i remember dave saying to me one
time why do you act like i’m your enemy
[Music]
and so that but that was your experience
that was that was my experience and i
think that
something that we all have to learn and
this this was a challenge for me
you have to learn how to act on the word
of god rather than
reacting to whatever is bringing that
emotional upset to you right you know
like
if
if dave would be or anybody else would
be the least bit stern with me because
my dad was so
mean i would immediately get
you know like you’re not you’re not
going to treat me that way yeah and you
know some people just have stronger
personalities they don’t
they’re not trying to be mean or but i
was i was very
overly sensitive and so i’d like
for people that are listening today to
remember that
if you’ve been hurt a lot you probably
are going to be
overly sensitive to certain
things that you need to be careful about
and to take responsibility for your own
behavior
and this was big to be patient
because when you have the kind of mess
in your life that i had in mind
no matter how much you want it to it’s
not all going to change
overnight it’s going to take time and
you’re going to have setbacks
you’re going to have times where you
know you feel like
you’ve gotten free in an area and then
all of a sudden
it comes up again and you know like if
you’ve ever peeled an onion
which i know you have it’s comes off in
little tiny
layers and sometimes you think am i ever
going to get to the good part of this
and that’s kind of the way emotional
healing can be sometimes because your
emotions
are they’re a hidden part of you
and so it’s a great way to explain it
yeah it’s on the
inside of you and so we can pretend
that everything is okay but still
just be having really bad thoughts about
people and
bad attitudes behind the scene and
god really wants us to face truth the
psalmist david said
god desires truth in the inner being
so he wants he wants us to be authentic
and genuine and real and
it just takes time philippians 1 6 says
that he
hath begun a good work in us is well
able to complete it and bring it to
its finish deuteronomy 7 says that god
delivers us from our enemies
little by little
and that onion is a great example right
because as you peel off those layers and
deal with different things and get
deeper
they’re going to be a lot of tears yeah
it’s going to stink a little bit now and
then
so that’s really a very good way to look
at it and when you say to have patience
you’re talking about having patience
with yourself yeah and
and others too i’m sure as you walk
through this but
did did you have those times that you’re
like
god when am i going to get there oh my
gosh yeah
ginger i had i probably gave up 1 000
times
you know and sometimes i’d even try to
get god to feel sorry for me well
that’s it i just i can’t i can’t go
through this anymore
i just give up it’s almost like funny
because
you’re not going to give up you know
once you really fall in love with jesus
no matter how hard your days are you’re
always going to come back around to
knowing that you need god let’s talk
about this
reaction are acting
on the word you see i had to find out
that i could feel wrong and still behave
right
and that was a pretty major thing for me
when i
realized that and i’ve written a couple
of books on managing your emotions and
one called living beyond your feelings
and that’s that’s even to forgive
somebody you know when you forgive
somebody
you don’t necessarily feel like doing it
nor do you feel like it’s fair
or but you do it because you love god
and that’s what he’s asked you to do
and we need to be smart enough to
realize that
god is always right whatever he tells us
to do is for our
benefit and you know so i would have a
lot of these pouting spells where maybe
i mean in the very beginning of our
marriage if dave made me mad ginger i
could not speak a word to him for three
weeks
three weeks three weeks now that there
weren’t
too many three weekers but i would
i was very bad at pouting and staying
mad and the reason why i did that was
because
i had always seen my dad get his way
through anger yeah and so i would i
would react
the way i had seen him behave sure
and i learned i had to learn enough of
the word
to learn how to act on the word
rather than reacting and so
what happens is at first you don’t do it
at all and then
after a while you start you’ll recognize
it and so
maybe you’ll act bad for a little while
and then you’ll say no that’s not right
you change your mind until all the way
up to now
i would say the biggest majority of the
time
and i’m not saying never because i still
do sometimes but
instead of reacting to the
devil’s stimulus that he’s trying to use
against me
i can say i recognize it’s the enemy and
i recognize that i don’t have to be that
way
but if i were to talk about the thing
that probably was
facing truth was really hard what kind
of truth
well just like i mean i always thought
all the problems in my marriage was dave
if dave would do this if dave would do
that if dave would do this
and one day i was praying for dave to
change
and the holy spirit spoke in my heart
dave’s not the problem
and i really thought i honestly thought
well who is there’s only me and him
i mean he had you know yeah and god
revealed to me
what it was like to live with me and
i cried for like three days i think i
was just so
i don’t know just disappointed in myself
didn’t want it to be my
fault you know when you’ve had a
lifetime of blaming
other people it’s very hard it’s
painful to say i’m hard to get along
with
yeah those are hard words to come to
grips with
i have unforgiveness in my heart you
know i
i make a big deal out of every little
thing i’m i’m not
merciful it’s it’s challenging to admit
all those things
but i want to say again that is the
first step
toward freedom but probably the thing
that took me the
longest to get over
completely was feeling guilty all the
time
because i had always felt guilty about
what my dad was doing to me even though
it wasn’t my fault
you know it’s our secrets that make us
sick and so i had this big nasty secret
that i had to
keep all the time and so i always
always felt guilty always
and it didn’t
it didn’t matter if it was a little
thing or a big thing
and then as i got into a relationship
with god and i started
hearing these things about there’s no
guilt there’s no condemnation
i became a very religious christian
in the beginning to keep the guilt away
well no i was yeah
trying to do everything perfect
so i didn’t have to have that burden of
guilt
and it it it took me a good number
of years it got better that’s the thing
that people need to
you know realize and something i’d like
to say to our viewers today is
please please please celebrate your
progress
and don’t only think about how far you
have to go yeah that’s a great thing
and some things are going to be harder
than others i mean there may be some
things that you’ll get over
much quicker and then there’s yeah other
things i share that one of the things
that i still deal with
is i don’t like any kind of strife
are upset in the family
you know it’s like i mean one of my sons
told me one time he said you can’t
expect
us to all work together and be around
each other as much as we are
and never ever have any kind of a
conflict and but see it doesn’t matter i
mean if it’s two of my kids not getting
along or whatever i can’t
it’s hard for me to settle down and be
peaceful until it’s solved
and it relates directly to the turmoil
that was in my house
all the time and the whole game that
everybody played was let’s keep dad from
getting mad
right you know my mother did it i did it
my brother did it
and if he was mad then we started doing
i guess what i call the dance you know
where we would just
you know try all these different things
to get him back
in a good mood and so it took me a long
time to get to the point where i didn’t
carry some kind of a
burden of guilt or always be
kind of um
vaguely you got to be careful about the
vague
things in their life your life they’re
not the like right in your face
type things but i always had like this
feeling around me that just kind of like
waiting for the next bad thing to happen
and there’s a scripture in proverbs 15
15 that talks about evil forebodings
and so it’s like we’ve been set free
from that
but i was always instead of expecting
something good
which is what hope is i was more
expecting the next problem because
that’s all i’d had you know in my life
yeah but if you want to just boil it
down for our viewers to probably two of
the things that were the hardest i would
say it was his facing truth
and you know i still don’t enjoy it you
know who does
it’s hard who wants to say you know
i didn’t act right in that situation and
it doesn’t really matter what you did
you know we always want to say well i
shouldn’t have acted
i shouldn’t have acted that way but you
know
you shouldn’t have but god wants us to
get to the point where we just take
responsibility for
us and i think if we can stop playing
this blame game
it opens the door for god to deal with
the other person
if they aren’t behaving right so i would
say that that facing the truth and
the guilt thing getting over that were
probably two of the hardest things for
me
yeah well thank you very much i’m sure
it’s
encouraging to people when you talk
about having patience
with yourself and knowing that you can
stand on what god says that he will
continue that good work in you right
so there’s hope out there yes there is
and i hope everybody’s been encouraged
you
Joyce..I felt better about ginger being cold and making fun of you..but this podcast was better…your still on the right road..I would love to talk to you one on one..maybe that cam happen .all in God’s plan.who knows..my heart goes out I still feel you fighting with your true thoughts and feelings..not being able to share with anyone..especially being in the know makes it extra hard..I had that going on 30 plus years ago..I knew but I couldn’t tell anyone..ended up in several nuthouses and medicated.all I needed was to accept myself..after I got the green light from God I finally did..it took a long time.i think it’s safe to say everyone has skeletons in their closet.dont be too hard on yourself but you are right..if you want to get rid of old junk..you have to face yourself…its hard and painful but once you do…your load gets lighter..I was ugly b4 MY cross…we all have one not just Jesus..he didn’t die for us..he paved the way…I still would love to talk but maybe somewhere down the road..not sure what all God has up his sleeve but I know it will be good for those that love and trust him..you are going to be free from Satan’s lies that have had you in bandage within yourself..we DO have a bond..mI love you God loves you and Has plans to make you happy..and fulfilled
JOYCE..GOD LOVES YOU…GOD IS LOVE..NOT AN IMAGE IN THE SKY..HE HAS BEEN TEACHING ME..IM PASSING IT ON TO ANYONE THAT WILL HEAR AND ACCEPT IT.I KNOW IT WAS FOREIGN AT FIRST…THATS HOW PEOPLE FELT ABOUT JESUS.THE TRINITY IS COMPLICATED ONLY IF YOU THINK ABOUT IT..SINCE GOD IS THE SPIRIT OF UNCONDITIONAL LOVE..HE NEEDED A VOLUNTEER TO BE HIS VOICE..WITHOUT KNOWIN ANY DETAILS…I TOOK THE JOB..NOT KNOWING IT INVOLVED BEING ATTACKED BY AN ANGRY MOB BEING DESPISED AND REJECTED..MOCKED AND HATED AND BEATEN..I STAY IN CONSTAND PAIN…BURNING FROM BELOW MY BACK DOWN MY LEGS AND BOTTOM OF MY FEET. AND SCIATIC NERVE IN RIGHT HIP…IT GETS ESCRUCIATING..DEPENDS ON WHAT I SAY…THE VOLUME GETS SO HIGH I GET OUT OF BREATH…IM NOT WANTING PITY.I KNOW IT WILL BE OVER SOON.MANY THINK IM SMITTEN BY GOD BECAUSE IM A GLBTQ MEMBER…IF SO..HE WOULDNT HAVE WAITED OVER 30 YRS TO DO ALL THIS..IT STARTED WITH THE VIRUSI TOLD YOU ALL THAT TO GIVE YOU AN IDEA.I TRY TO KEEP MY MIND BUSY..THE MORE I ACKNOWLEDGE THE PAIN IT JUST MAGNIFIES IT.
ANYWAY..GOD…NEEDS MORE MOUTHPIECES.. I CHOSE YOU.HE DID 2..BABY STEPS ARE GOOD..WE CAN DOIT.I LOVE HEARING YOU.YOU HAVE THE GIFT OF SPEAKING AND WE BOTH JUST PUT IT OUT THERE..ONLY DIFFERENCE IS..YOU ATLEAST HAVE A SMALL FILTER…I DONT…I TRY BUT IT DONT WORK…WHEN IM DONE WITH MY JOYCEATHON 2NIGHT IM GOING TO LOOK UP THE 2 OLIVE BRANCHES AND THE 2 WITNESSES..WE DO HAVE A SPECIAL BOND.WE ARE BOTH SPIRITUAL AND WE BOTH HAVE A DRIVE…..IF U STAY WITH ME..YES..THEY WILL SAY ALL KINDS OF THINGS…THEY DID TO JESUS…TOSS IT TO THE WIND…I WANT YOU TO START WORKING WITH ME…INSTEAD OF SAYING GOD…USE THE WORD LOVE..WHEN YOU ARE MEDITATING..THE ENEMY IS WHIPPING ME THE DEEPER I GO..MY BUTT LEGS AND FEET ARE ON FIRE NOW…ALL GOOD..IT WILL ONE DAY SOON BE OVER. I SHARED THIS WITH U ONCE BUT IM GONNA SAY IT AGAIN GRIN…GOD( LOVE,) SAID THERE WILL BE A DAY WHEN YOU WONT TELL YOUR NEIGHBOR OR BROTHER…KNOW THE LORD..FOR THEY SHALL ALL KNOW ME FROM THE LEAST OF THEM TO THE GREATEST.ILL TRY TO FIND WHERE IT IS AND SEND IT..MEANING EVERYONE WILL KNOW LOVE.IM PASSED WANTING THAT..BEING HATED IS GETTING KINDA OLD..YOU WILL BE FIND..HOLD MY HAND AND DONT LET GO ANYMORE OK?